Bronx & Beans

You know, we don't mind Beans contributor Halo Hughes gloating over another torrid July for his beloved Angels.

With the specter of their powerhouse offense once again grinding to a complete stop against the quality pitching of October --- What do you think we can expect from Vlad Guerrero this postseason? .125 batting average? Eight strikeouts? In three games? --- I guess I'd savor the moment, too.

But kissing up to Yankee fans? Just shameful!

Here's an excerpt: "A confession: I like the Yankees, hate the Red Sox ... Yankee fans don't whine. You don't do that. Neither do Angel fans. Red Sox and Met fans? They whine. I hate them."

We'll forget the fact that Halo Hughes then proceeded to do little else BUT whine... 'Michael Kay made fun of us... Wah, Wah, Wah....The Angels were in a bus crash 20 years ago...Wah. Wah. Wah.'

I suppose it doesn't take a trained analyst to uncover where this rage comes from.

The two Sox postseason sweeps of recent years were bad, but the real sting began on that afternoon in1986.

You know... Gene Mauch pulls Mike Witt from Game 5 of the ALCS in the ninth inning. Donnie Moore comes in to close out the series and send the Halos to their first World Series, Al Michaels cries, '...and Downing goes back, and it's GONE!!' Dave Henderson clumsily hops around the bases. The mounted police quietly return to the exits... And, somewhere in that quiet stadium, according to sources, a young Halo Hughes is there.

Cue Robin Williams from 'Good Will Hunting'... 'Son, all of these things that happened... It's not your fault. It's not your FAULT!.'

It wasn't your fault when the Angels took 'Rooster' Burleson, and he was never heard from again. Or when Freddie Lynn went west, rediscovered his wavy-gravy California temperment, and forgot how to win.

Or when Mo Vaughn moved to Anaheim and, well, fell down the dugout steps.

Look, these things happen. And, yes, 1986 was a lousy year. But, hey, we got over it.

-- Dennehy

In the interest of equal time . . . but really because we're going to love posting Donnie Moore, Doug DeCinces and Dave Henderson photos each time the Yankees beat the California Angels this weekend . . . we let Halo Hughes open his trap once more. Here he goes.

Yes, we lost. I will say this slowly so Yankee fans can drink in this vast accomplishment and all the gravitas forthwith. THE......YANKEES......ACTUALLY......BEAT.....THE ANGELS. Twice even. It really happened.

It doesn't change Angel dominance of all things pinstripes. No, that goes back a decade or more and at least a billion in Yankee payroll. Nice to see we ensured the split Friday night with a 1-0 win in the Bronx though. So Sunday we give Vlad the day off. It's a getaway Sunday. The final day of an East Coast 7-3 swing. Not bad. A sweep in Fenway. Two out of four at Yankee Stadium. I'm not complaining. But a nice little win for those pesky little Yanks. See you next weekend on the Left Coast. Feel good about yourselves.

The Halos come home to Angels Stadium for a set with the Orioles. Not a good thing. As much as we have owned the Yankees, it's been the opposite with the O's. Couple of things to think about. Ripken gets the streak. Against who? The 1995 Angels, the uh hum, Tony Phillips Angels, sniff, sniff. That bus crash on the Jersey Turnpike a couple of years before that nearly killed the entire Angel club? Oh, it happened on the way to Baltimore.

So the Halos will drop one, maybe two, to the O's before we do our usual home punch out of the Yanks next weekend at the place where I did sooooo many things for the first time.

I'll give you just one: I'm working as a barback at Angel Stadium. It's 1981 and I'm 17 but i'm pouring beer and making a mean cocktail in the Grand Slam Room off the first base side on the terrace level. Sure it's illegal, a minor pouring cocktails, but it's baseball baby.

In the 6th inning, we break down the room and I have to wheel back the booze and leftover food to the Stadium Club on the club level. What a place that was. I'm in the elevator. Maybe I sampled some of the free Pabst, maybe I didn't. What's important is that in the elevator, about 5-foot-3 at this point in his life and probably three sheets to the wind himself is "The Cowboy" Gene Autry.

The man responsible for so much of my pain growing up. The man who made me think it was OK to carry a Bob Oliver baseball card in my wallet. The man who made me think "Papa Jack" Ron Jackson, could actually hit, long before he reinvented himself as a "hitting" coach for the...well you know who he coaches for. So I'm in the elevator and I say, and I'm not making this up, " How's it hangin' Gene?"

He looks at me with an expression of befuddled haze and maybe anger and I'm ushered out the door. I didn't get fired but it was because of that old-fashioned greeting between two old buddies, employer to employee really, that the Angels started a new policy where no stadium employees could ride the elevator with Gene. I'm told it still exists with Arte. My legacy.

Next Saturday, look for me, my son Q-Fabulous and Lou-the-Doo, my old man, in section 44 at Angel Stadium. Q's 9 so he sports the classic red Angel cap, I'll be going retro classic for the occasion: classic, 1971 style, small 'a' with the gold halo, Navy cap, red bill. Lou the Doo goes with the navy mid 1990s look: 'CA' with the silver halo that has never quite fit across his dome since I bought it for him at a game against the Brewers on July 27th, 1996.

Why do I remember this date?

The same night that dude lit a bomb at the Atlanta Olympics. All things lead back to the Halos, good, and mostly, if you chart back nearly 50 years, bad. Lou wears his lid Albert Belle 3/4 style, by the way.

A mean threesome.

I had the pleasure Friday night of listening to the people sitting behind me and Halo Hughes at the Stadium yell at him for Angel fandom. And I let them have at it as much as possible.

But Angels fans these days are cute and funny with how amazing their team is. They cling to 2002 like it was their first-born child. Oh wait, it kinda was. Sure, they tend to beat the Yankees handily -- they were the only team to have a .500 record or better in the Joe Torre era -- but they've been doing that for years. In the 1980s and early '90s, West Coast road trips were the worst for Yankees fans and it had nothing to do with the 10:30 p.m. start time.

After one measly World Series title -- one! -- Angels fans walk on water. Here's an email Halo Hughes wasted cyberspace with on Sunday night:

"so when does the 'We actually beat the Angels' party end? Lots of crying and group hugging i would imagine. Congrats on this early august feat!"

Here's what I have to say in response to Halo Hughes and how amazing his Angels are:

1) Your biggest deadline acquisition, Mark Teixeira hit a go-ahead grand slam in the 8th inning and your team still lost.

2) Your team gave up a home run to Jose Molina.

3) Your team scored ZERO runs against Sidney Ponson. Sidney Ponson!

4) K-Rod will break the saves record because your offense is sketchy as best.

Now let's take a look at the greatest game the Angels ever played (note: we'll leave the Dave Henderson jokes to the Beans):

Halo Hughes, you're dismissed.

Everyone in Red Sox Nation is so quick to hammer Manny Ramirez these days and to kiss the vacated ground in left field now that he's bleeding Dodger Blue with Joe Torre.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but in his eight years in Boston, didn't he help the Red Sox win two World Series rings? Correct me if I'm wrong, but in the 82 years before he moved to Beantown, didn't the Red Sox win zero World Series rings?

Man up, Red Sox fans and give Manny the credit he deserves. You sound like a bunch of lazy incumbents awaiting a ninth-straight re-election to Congress.

As of this writing, the Sox are looking to put a finishing touch on a victory over the punchless A's and the Rays are stumbling in extras against the Motor City Kitties. The Yankees won a slugfest over the Halos and the White Sox are getting crushed by the Royals. Also, the Twinkies slipped past the Tribe.

Where am I going with this? Because it's all indicative of the Doomsday Scenario that AL baseball fans had better be prepared for next month.

Most of you are probably Bombers fans, so let me put this simply so your feeble brains can understand it.

I've looked into my crystal ball, and here's what I see:

-It's the last weekend of the season - Friday to be exact - and the Yanks, BoSox, Rays, Twinkies, Kitties and PaleHose all have 90 wins. Three games to go each.
-The Yanks play the Red Sox. The Tigers play the Rays. The Twins go up against the Royals and the Bogus Sox play the Wahoos.
-The Angels have 100 wins already and have locked up the division and homefield throughout the playoffs and World Series. Halo Hughes dances awkwardly around in the newsroom at the thought of a Freeway Series that only he will care about.
-That leaves six teams competing for three playoff spots. Get ready for a weekend of nerve-racking baseball.

Now, I know there are holes to my theory. The Rays have to keep playing well and the Tigers have to start playing much better. The Rangers can't catch fire, which is still possible. The Yanks pitching has to hold out and the Red Sox have to keep hitting without Manny.

But you heard it here first. The final weekend in September is going to be one to remember.

--Whittle

In terms of rivalries, this decade's edition of the California Angels are like the Texas Rangers of the 1990s. They hang around for a few years and make the playoffs and have a player no one wants to pitch to (Vlad G. = JuanGon). The only difference is these California Angels actually win games against the Yankees and Red Sox.

And with the Angels in town for another turn at the Stadium, fresh off a sweep of the Red Sox in Fenway, Halo Hughes had started yapping again about his beloved Angels.

In the interest of equal time, we decided to let Halo Hughes have his say during Thursday night's game. Below is work. By the way, Halo Hughes and Bronx La Monica will be in Section 23 at the Stadium tonight, so come by and say to hi to La Monica and throw peanuts at Hughes. Just look for the guy in a Vince Ferragamo T-shirt caught in a sleeper hold by a guy in a Mattingly jersey.

From Halo Hughes, during the 12-6 Angels romp over the Yanks

Continue reading "Here comes 'Halo Hughes'" »

Well, it’s finally over.

After eight seasons of monster numbers and baffling behavior, the strange and unforgettable Manny Ramirez era in Boston has ended. His childish campaign to get traded this month finally paid off with a three-player deal that sends him to the Dodgers.

Manny’s out. Jason Bay is in.

A couple months ago, when Manny was chasing 500 home runs and giving fans high-fives during defensive plays, most Red Sox fans hoped the Manny era would never end. Now, I suspect most are glad it’s finally over.

Does it stink to lose a future Hall-of-Famer? Someone who protected David Ortiz in the lineup? A batter whom Yankee fans feared more than any other? What foolish questions - of course!

Will a mid-level All Star like Jason Bay replace all those RBIs, never mind force pitchers to throw Papi strikes? I’m not holding my breath.

Not to mention, the team also had to dump other young players in order to unload Manny.

Thanks, Manny! Every other team added depth the trade deadline. The Sox get thinner.

Continue reading "So long, Manny.. Don't let the door hit you" »

When news broke Sunday of the latest Manny Ramirez meltdown/flakeout/tantrum/hissy fit, he asked Boston to "just send me a letter" at the end of the season to say thanks for the memories and we'll see you around.

Bronx & Beans then asked our readers to send us their letters to Manny. Islander505 won the battle, hands down. Here's what he had to say:

A "letter" for Manny? How about some appropriate help from our friends at Sesame Street? Kermit says todays letter for Manny, is the letter "G"

"G" as in I am Grateful that you Got the letter "F" and Favre off the front pages, but..
"G" as in Good God
"G" as in Grow up
"G' as in Get Going.
"G" as in play Good baseball.
"G" as in you are Grating everyone's nerves.
"G" as in your talent is a Gift.
"G" as in Get a Grip
"G" as in focus on Going long rather than Going home.
"G" as in nobody likes a Gonad.

On the 11 p.m. SportCenter Wednesday night, baseball analyst Buster Olney lit up Manny Ramirez the way Manny usually lights up Yankees pitching. Here's his quote during a segment about whether Boston will trade Manny to the Marlins or elsewhere:

"The Red Sox front office is talking a look at the situation and their question is this: Can we convince him to play hard the last wo months? And from their perspective, when you see him go down the line Monday night in 5.7 seconds and go down the line in 5.17 seconds -- which is considered glacial in baseball -- during a no-hitter, they have to seriously ask themselves the question and they have, 'Have we lost him?'"

Did Olney just call RBI machine Ramirez an immovable-although-slightly-smaller-in-stature-these-days-because-of-global-warming block of frozen water? I think he did!

After three tough days, we enjoyed watching William Morris Agency hero Alex Rodriguez smash a clutch 7th inning solo home run to cement a 10-2 lead for the Yankees.

It seems the Bombers could have used that hit in the ninth inning Tuesday. Or during Monday night's loss. Or Sunday night when the Yankes had Jon Lester on the ropes.

No mind. Some more numbers to support the case for another MVP award in November.

Did you notice who DID hammer out some clutch hits during this series? Old 'Cowboy Up' buddy Kevin Millar, former clown prince of the Red Sox, who I believe is NOT with the William Morris Agency.






So acute were the Yankees' flashbacks after Millar's burly performance - the jovial fella entered today hitting .362 (17-for-47) with six homers and nine RBIs against them this year - that reliever Edwar Ramirez today fired some cheese behind Millar's head in the 7th.

The umpire, not knowing the Yankees are above such thuggish behavior as intentionally throwing at a hitter, tossed Ramirez.

-- Dennehy

IRegular Bronx & Beans readers know our penchant here for making strong friendly wagers with our fandom and then posting the thoroughly embarrasing results after the fact.

Although the Yankees have lost their last two games by a total score of 22-6, Tuesday has been a banner day. It's payout day, the day where those pesky Beans must make do with donning the Yankees jerseys since their BoSox lost the series in Fenway this past weekend.

We'll get things started with Bean Whittle, then hit you with some Bean Dennehy footage. It's quite a fun trip through the office.

P.S. Two series left and we've got some serious friendly wagers in place for those. Let's just say they involve mustached all-timers and karaoke.

Be wery wery qwiet, we're hunting Whittle.

Here, let me help you with that."

Dejection.

It's a sad, sad world.

"I'll make a brand new start of it in ol' New York!"

I think maybe we're having a little too much fun with this bet.

Bronx Fernandez approves of his work

Bean Dennehy is none too happy.

Bean Dennehy comes to grips with his fate.

"De-rek Je-ter! De-rek Je-ter! De-rek Je-ter!"

Let's go Yankees!

We know you watched the games and read the stories and columns from this little three-game series up there at Fenway Park.

Now that it's Monday morning and you're back at work talking smack to all the Beans in your office, get a little extra motivation by reliving the series with our photo gallery. Click the ticked-off Kevin Youkilis' face to see the whole album.

Hooray for Beantown. They avoided the sweep by those scrappy Yankees. And they did it by beating up Sidney Ponson. Congratulations.

At last check, Ponson went in the 18th round of the Newsday softball draft, in between last Sunday's travel section and Saturday's leftover bagel spreads.

But, you know, hey, that's cool. At least you didn't get swept, right? Tuesday will be joyous as Beans Dennehy and Whittle strut around the office in Yankees jerseys.

Crazy Manny sounded off on the 890 ESPN Radio in Boston on Sunday afternoon. After listening to the sound bite and reading the news stories a few times, I finally decided on my favorite quote:

"Enough is enough. I'm tired of them, they're tired of me. After 2008, just send me a letter or whatever, you don't even have to call my agent or anything."

That's just hilarious. So, dear Bronx and Beans readers, let's start crafting a letter to Manny. We're asking for your best paragraphs here, people, especially you Islander505. I know you've got something good in your arsenal. Email me at mark.lamonica@newsday.com with your best stuff and we'll concoct the letter and post it in Bronx and Beans on Thursday morning just as the trading deadline draws near.

Let's do this full disclosure thing first: I'm a Yankees fan AND I like Manny Ramirez.

Strange combination, I know, but so is Manny.

We're loving how the wheels are coming off in Boston again this weekend as the Yankees come into town, Joba buzzes Youkilis (again!), then Craig Hansen retaliates the next day by throwing the baseball like Nook LaLoosh and miraculously having one pitch end at A-Rod's left arm.

And on Sunday, before Sidney Ponson even started to warmup, Manny decides he wants to be traded . . . to Iraq!

He's ready to leave Boston again -- his annual mid-summer flakeout is in full effect -- and wants to be traded before the July 31 deadline.

Theo and the Beans would be silly to make that deal (unless they get a stud bat back or sign Barry Bonds). We all know this. But from the view here in the Bronx, it's always fun to watch the train wreck as it happens.

P.S. Manny will likely hit two bombs tonight off Ponson because he's angry and because, well, it's Sidney Ponson.

So how has this weekend gone so far?

That thug Joba got our blood boiling Friday night when he ONCE AGAIN threw high heat near Kevin Youkilis's head.

The sputtering Sox offense hasn't resembled the machine that devoured the league in '07 (and is getting almost nothing from the leadoff spot or the catchers). The bullpen seems to be regressing.

And Saturday's ugly 10-3 loss triggered flashbacks to the hideous lost weekend in 2006 when the Yankees won 5 games in 4 days.

(There was also the matter of watching LaMonica and Fernandez giggle like Robinson Cano over their first successful bet of the season).

A sweep tonight wouldn't be fatal for the Sox, but it wouldn't bode well, either. Which makes this one of those character-defining games, when the team's battle-tested veterans step forward, restore order and save the summer. Right, guys? Guys?!?

The problem, of course, is that those veterans are shouldering problems that transcend this recent slump. David Ortiz is trying to find his groove after nearly two months on the shelf. Old reliable Jason Varitek looks lost against good pitching, Curt Schilling is done for the year.

And, of course, our guy Manny Ramirez is once again picking the perfect time to flake out on his teammates. And this time he seems to have finally exhausted the patience of a loyal fanbase and generous ownership.

Continue reading "Alright, Sox, deeeep breath" »

What a disappointing inning. And I don't just mean giving up four runs. More frustrating was the missed chance to assert themselves - the way Pedro used to do regularly against the Yanks, and the way even Bronson Arroyo did against A-Rod four years ago.

If Joba is going to be the tough guy against Youkilis, the heart of this team, then some Sox pitcher has to respond. And was there a better chance than against A-Rod with first base open? First base open? A little high, a little tight... Someone?

It took too long for the Sox to earn top dog status in the AL East. It's going to take some hard ball to keep it.

- Dennehy

Bean Dennehy is growing more furious as the inning goes on.

Here's his line after Melky Cabrera scores the go-ahead run:

"He bunts, he steals second and scores on that Sally hit!"

From the bar scene here at Jeremy's Ale House after two innings with the Yanks trailing 2-0:

- Why did the 6-7 Wakefield decide to pick today to make his knuckleball dance like Shakira?

- Why did A-Rod decide to boot that ball and allow two runs to score?

- We traded for Nady so he could hit that weak nubber? What kind of ball do they play in Pittsburgh?

- Why did it take so long for the bar to play some Bon Jovi?

Again, these are just early exaggerations. We're sure they'll et worse as the jack-splash-cokes get stronger.

Go Yanks!