Politirazzi

Dear John and Barack,

You had a good thing going there for a while. We were all talking about things that mattered, such as health care and the meltdown on Wall Street but apparently it was too good to last. Shall I paraphrase the turn the conversation has taken since yesterday?

McCain: Hi, America. You guys don’t seem to like me when we talk about the economy, so I’m going to talk about something else: Barack Obama can’t be trusted.

Obama: Oh yeah, John? Well, America loves me when we talk about the economy (Keating Five) so I’m going to keep talking about the economy (seriously, America, look up the Keating Five). See? I can fight! How do you like me now?

Really, guys? Do we have to do this? John, this reeks of desperation. Your timing, as usual, sucks. Barack, if you take the bait and descend into the mud with John and Sarah, you will look like a tool.

In short, boys, get your damn acts together. Preferably before 9 p.m. this evening.

Kisses,
Meg

By Meg

Demerit: Lies, All Lies!
It’s not like we need the VP candidates to be concerned with telling the truth or anything. Whoppers and exaggerations included “budget-neutral” vs. "government run" health care; records on taxes; Spain; funding the troops; sounding the bell on Fannie and Freddie; the surplus in Iraq; shall I go on?

Gold Star: “Hey, Can I Call You Joe?”
Whoever told her to ask that is a genius. Palin knew that Biden would not risk being labeled sexist by returning the favor and calling her Sarah. It was a power play, and it was brilliant.

Demerit: Screwing Gays (Not Literally)
Both candidates showed about as much warmth towards our homosexual brethren as Cardinal Egan would at a drag show. Same-sex benefits fall stunningly short, period. I was so pleasantly surprised to hear that Sarah Palin “tolerates” homosexuals, though. That’s really, really big of her. I think we found the next Grand Marshall of the Pride Parade!

Gold Star: Gwen Ifill
Any question of partiality left my mind after she uttered the words that every viewer wanted to hear: “Neither of you really answered that last question.”

Demerit: Doggone It, You Betcha, Darn Right, Golly Gee, Aw Heck, Say-It-Ain’t-So, God Love Ya!

I like Ana Marie Cox’s thinking: Take a drink every time Gov. Palin says “you know” or “media.” I’d like to take a drink every time Joe Biden uses hyperbole to make his point, but I would literally be falling down drunk within thirty seconds. I’m not joking here, people. I’m totally serious.

— Meg

* Places to drink and debate while watching the debate in NYC.

By Meg

In anticipation of tomorrow's vice presidential debate, we look at how last week's presidential debate went:

Sorry to make you wait, Politirazzi — I know you crave my “grading ” pieces like a sugar addict craves candy. Although you wouldn’t know it from my red-pen-heavy assessment below, I actually enjoyed this debate.

Demerit:
Debating Whether or Not There Should Be a Debate

Gold Star: McCain on the Economy
Let me be clear: Neither candidate gave a stellar performance on this issue. Also, I was surprised by McCain’s slip on earmarks. However, I really thought, given the awful week he had leading up to the debate, that McCain was going to stumble, and he did not.

Gold Star: Obama on Foreign Policy
Again, neither candidate blew me away or even said anything that surprised me, but Obama was tougher than I expected. Stick to your guns on diplomacy, Barry.

Demerit: Jim Lehrer as Moderator
Are you comfortable, Jim? Would you like anything? A beverage, perhaps? How are the wife and kids? That’s good. What? There’s a debate going on? Oh.

Demerit: Shut it Down, Boys
I will never understand why, when thrown false or exaggerated accusations during a debate, politicians let them stand. An example of missed opportunity on both sides is the lies traded on health care: Obama stated that, under McCain’s health plan, employers would be taxed for health benefits offered. McCain stated that Obama’s plan hands the health care system over to the federal government. Both statements are false, yet both candidates missed the opportunity to deny those falsehoods.

By Meg

Hey, Barry, remember that time when you called John McCain up and asked him to join forces with you to issue a bipartisan statement on the economic crisis? Remember how John then turned around and made an announcement intimating that this renewed bipartisan spirit was his idea (and invoked 9/11 just for kicks)?

Then remember how John used the opportunity to pull the fire alarm right before the midterm — er, debate? All right after you called John up and offered to reach across the aisle to show Americans that both candidates have our best interest at heart? Remember that?

Well, that was stupid, Barry. Don’t do it again. Just as there is no crying in baseball, there is no true bipartisanship in an election. I hope you’ve learned your lesson.

In today’s Daily Dish, Andrew Sullivan links to the article he wrote shortly after 9/11. I can remember reading it when it was published in the New York Times, and I just reread it this afternoon. I’m surprised that I had forgotten how much I liked the article then, but more surprised that it still resonates today.

— Meg

MSNBC has decided to replace Molbermann (my celebrity couple hybrid name for them) with David Gregory during political night coverage. The happy couple will continue on as commentators ... which is really what they were.

I suppose it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to take credit for the ousting of Sid and Nancy because, let’s face it, MSNBC probably didn’t read my “Grading the DNC” post on this blog.

Aw, heck: You’re welcome!

— Meg

By Meg

Gold Star: Toning it Down for Gustav

It was necessary but also provided a good opportunity to show the “Country First” motto in action by raising funds for those in need.

Demerit: Gratuitous Self-Congratulation over Toning it Down for Gustav

Don’t start practicing those Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speeches just because you didn’t screw this one up, boys.

Gold Star: The Glorious Absence of George Bush and Dick Cheney

Obviously, I wish the circumstances that kept them away had been different but wow, McCain sure hit the lottery. Any chance he can keep them quiet until November?

Demerit: Rudy

Still an ass.

Gold Star: Sarah Palin: Hockey Mom

That pesky lack-of-experience thing made it necessary to focus on personal biography rather than policy, and it worked for her. My favorite line was about her husband: “Two decades and five children later, he’s still my guy.” Well executed and well presented.

Demerit: Sarah Palin: Candidate for VP

Smugness does not become you, Gov. Palin. I know you had many, many "responsibilities” as the mayor of Stars Hollow or wherever it is you came from, but you are undeserving of this nomination and your lack of humility highlights that strikingly. It is possible to attack your opponent and look tough doing so without being petty and without belittling and insulting everyone who has ever worked to better his or her community. For an example of how to do this, read the acceptance speeches of John McCain and Barack Obama and mimic. It will help you to sound less like the amateur that you are.

(continued)

Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin greets supporters in O'Fallon, Mo., but how many such supporters will she bring to John McCain. Meg's dissection. (AP)

By Meg

John McCain, a man who once could do no wrong in the eyes of this blogger, continues to disappoint me.

With his out-of-nowhere pick of Alaskan Gov. Sarah Palin to be his running mate, it’s clear that McCain has decided to rewrite his message to America. Instead of marketing McCain as the calm voice of experience, his campaign is bringing back the image of the maverick who will bring change to Washington. The soundness of reasoning behind and consequences of such a shift in tone are fodder for another discussion, but the Palin pick itself makes me seriously question McCain’s judgment.

I was already concerned by the rumors that McCain had crossed Pawlenty and Ridge off the short list and was heavily considering Joe Lieberman, but I was baffled when Team McCain, faced with the possibility of an RNC floor fight that would make “Braveheart” look like the Puppy Bowl, dumped Lieberman in favor of a candidate whose major experience consists of not-quite two years as the governor of a state whose entire population is less than that of many major U.S. cities. McCain and his supporters are painfully aware of the implications of his age. He knew how important it was for him, more so than his rival, to pick a candidate that is actually ready to be president. Is choosing Sarah Palin to be that candidate really John McCain’s idea of putting country first?

Here’s what we’ve learned about Sarah Palin since Friday:

(continued)

By Meg

Gold Star: Hillary

I think she knew this would be the speech of her career and, in my opinion, she hit it out of the park. Tough, resolved and rallying, Hillary was able to remain gracious to her supporters while pulling the political equivalent of Shatner telling the Trekkies to get a life. Phenomenal job,
Hillary.

Demerit: The Strange Chemistry between Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann

Someone find Dan Patrick, please. As the overall political “commentary” on MSNBC grows more and more impossible to watch, no two pundits make stranger bedfellows than Matthews and Olbermann. Perhaps the powers that be at MSNBC thought that Olbermann’s dry bemusement would be a sobering match for Matthews’ unbridled hysteria, but I beg to differ. It may have been the Colorado wind but every time I tuned in Matthews’ hair had gotten more out of control and Olbermann’s left eyebrow had risen higher. I miss Tim Russert.

Gold Star: MSNBC’s Election Theme Music

It makes me feel like chanting “USA! USA!” even more than the theme music to HBO’s “John Adams” miniseries did.

Gold Star: Michelle Obama

Can we elect her? (Seriously, can we?)

Demerit: CNN’s Interview of Ann Price Mills

After Hillary’s speech on Day 2 of the Convention, CNN interviewed delegate and Hillary supporter Ann Price Mills for her reaction, an interview that evolved quickly from interesting to unintentionally hilarious to oh-no-I-think-she’s-off-her-meds.

A good reporter would have ended the interview as soon as Mills made it clear that she was leaving the land of lucidity but, God bless CNN, they kept the camera on her for almost four minutes. Journalism at its best.

Gold Star: The Look on Anderson Cooper’s Face after CNN’s Interview of Ann Price Mills.

Gold Star: Obama’s Acceptance Speech

Finally, we see some fight from the guy. I knew it had to be in there. He’s from Chicago, for goodness sake. Here’s hoping he continues to act like it.

Demerit: The Music Following Obama’s Acceptance Speech

We get it: He’s one of Us. But country music? Really? Bring back Bruce Springsteen. Stat. Bruuuuce!

By Meg

Give! (clap) That! (clap) Girl a Hand! (clap) Give That Girl a Hand! (clap-clap, clap-clap)

Geez, people, leave Cindy alone.

Poor Mrs. McCain was treated for a minor sprain on Wednesday after being hand-strangled at a campaign event.

I smell a rat. Who is really responsible for this? Enthusiastic McCain supporter ... or a disguised Rachael Ray finally getting her revenge? America deserves to know!

(Photo: Los Angeles Times)

By Meg

The Edwards affair seems to have struck a nerve with a lot of people I know. I’ll be honest with you, Politirazzi readership: I couldn’t care less about political affairs of the heart unless, of course, the scandal involves outright abuse of power.

I might be interested in reading about an affair where the politician in question — and this is just a hypothetical off the top of my head — had been shuttling his mistress to and fro’ the Hamptons via personal NYPD escort, but a good, old-fashioned, toe-tappin’-on-the-bathroom-floor-type Washington sex scandal has really never aroused (insert Beavis and/or Butthead laugh here) my curiosity or concern. Hence my complete lack of interest in John’s liaison dangereus.

But maybe I’m missing something? The fact of the matter is that no politician I’ve ever voted for has been involved in a sex scandal.

Clinton? I was so totally over him by the time Monica hit the news. McGreevy? More like McSkeevy. Spitzer? Hey, karma’s a bitch, buddy.

So I thought it necessary to get the perspective of someone who voted for Edwards. Unfortunately, I could only find one: My brother, Kevin, a registered Democrat who voted for Edwards in the N.J. primary in February. (Remember, Edwards dropped out of the race in January. Yeah, stubbornness runs in the family.)

Meg Boyle: Thanks for talking to us today, Kevin.

Kevin Boyle: Thanks for having me, Meg.

MB: So, how stupid do you feel right now?

KB: I don’t feel stupid at all. John Edwards is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.

MB: Have you spoken with John? How is he?

(continued)

Obamaniacs celebrate his big 4-7.

By Meg

I couldn’t possibly fashion an Internet round-up as comprehensive as our own Kim’s, but the coverage of Barack Obama’s 47th birthday yesterday made me wonder: How did Obama’s supporters choose to mark the anniversary of their savior’s birth? My need for instant gratification led me to do a quick and completely unscientific search on The Google:

A community blog in Iowa has identified thirty-two groups of excessively cheerful Democrats who each plan to celebrate Obama’s 47th by making 47 phone calls to encourage Iowans to Get Out and Vote. Cake and ice cream to follow!!!

A blogger featured on WordPress speculated that the presumptive Democratic nominee would be wishing for a new grill for his backyard. (Check out the picture. Not Barry’s most flattering angle.)

(continued)

By Meg

After sequestering myself for an extended vacation on a sleepy little island where the only headline news concerned a gang of attack turkeys (oh but I’m not kidding), I definitely owe the Politirazzi readership a bigger, grander blog entry than what I’m about to reveal. But I just have to show you all my favorite new T-shirt.

It’s true. We can’t hide it any longer. And why should we? Sure, there are factors that stand in our way (geography, his spouse, etc.), but when two people share a love of political analysis and demographic trend watching, I believe they can overcome the steepest of hurdles.

By Meg

Can you pass the citizenship test?

I’m a test junkie. It’s pretty nerdy, I know, but I love taking tests and get very angry with myself if I do poorly. At my last physical, my cholesterol came back a tad high and I barely spoke to myself for three days.

I can always count on MSN to provide me with a fix, especially in the ramp up to any holiday. To celebrate the upcoming day of our nation’s birth (as well as the eerie, same-day, heavy-on-the-significance deaths of John Adams and Thomas Jefferson), MSN has thrown down the gauntlet by challenging us to a few of the questions that will appear on the new citizenship test. I thought it would be fun for us Politirazzi to take the test — including our loyal readers (I know you’re out there…have the courage to speak!).

So how did you do, Meg? Oh, you know, I don’t like to brag … but I will. Ninety percent correct, bitches!!

By Meg

As I type, Obama is giving a speech on the meaning of patriotism. This coincides with an absolutely fascinating article in today’s Washington Post about one city in Ohio where the false rumors about Obama have reached a sort of critical mass (the rumor that Barry’s a homosexual is new to me but may serve to cement Dan’s fantastic assertion that Michelle is the new gay icon).

The article focuses on one citizen who is having trouble reconciling the Barack Obama he reads about in the newspaper with the scary Muslim radical described on the Internet and through word of mouth. It’s a problem that I’m starting to see even in my own living room; my roommates were discussing Obama’s “strict Muslim faith” the other evening and both were amazed when I told them that he denies these rumors.

(continued)

(AP)

Gore finally endorsed Obama in Detroit last night. Better late than never, right? Right??

— Meg

By Meg

1. What will Clinton have to do/say to get her supporters to also throw their weight behind Obama?

Nothing. Sure, there will be some who refuse to vote for Obama because he’s not Hillary, just like there will be some Americans who will refuse to vote for Obama because he is black, some who refused to vote for Hillary because she’s a woman and some who will refuse to vote for McCain because ... I don’t know, they think he’s an alien or something.

There are always exceptions to every rule, but most Democrats are going to vote for the Democrat. They’re angry now, which is fine, but they will get over it.

Example: I watched Hillary’s fantastic concession speech (the real one) with a group of die-hard Hillary supporters, one of whom started chanting “Denver!” when Hillary took the podium. An hour later, they were all vowing to vote for Obama. We’re talking about people who were wearing Hillary buttons pinned to Hillary T-shirts. There was signage involved. But they turned pretty quickly. The majority of her supporters will do the same.

(continued)

By Meg

I’m still reeling from McCain’s awful speech from Tuesday night. It had all the passion and spirit of an elementary school production of "Stone Soup." The stiffness. The pauses as he struggled with the prompter. The overly rehearsed meter and intonation. That nervous smile (your mouth says, "yes, yes," John, but your eyes say, "no, no, no"). I expect more from McCain; nay, I demand more!

This is why I love that the candidates are considering more debates than the traditional Big Three. See, McCain was all:

“What’s up with having to wait until September to debate? Let’s get this party started with some Town Hall Meetings.”

Then Obama was all:

“I see your Town Hall Meetings and raise you one: Let’s get all Lincoln-Douglas on each other.”

Then McCain was all:

“Hmm, I’m not sure about that, but I’ll consider it.”

And Obama was all:

“OK, cool. I’ll have my people call your people.”

I’d like to see both formats used. Let’s light this candle.

By Meg

From the BBC:

Some of his older black supporters will tell you candidly that there is a bit of disbelief in there too — they never expected in their lifetimes to be able to support an African-American candidate with a real chance of winning the White House. Political campaigning is about mapping strategies, booking halls, buying advertising and beating rivals.

But every so often, in private, Mr. Obama and his closest advisers must surely lift their eyes to history's horizon and reflect on the powerful symbolism of his candidacy in a country which still lives with the legacy of racial division.

(continued)

(AP)

By Meg

Remember that big, rousing number in West Side Story when everyone sings in anticipation of the rumble? That’s kind of what’s going on within the Democratic party today (presumably with less dancing).

Two of Hillary Clinton’s senior officials told the Associated Press that Clinton will concede tonight that Barack Obama has enough delegates to win the Democratic nomination (way to sell your candidate out, kids). Hillary was, of course, quick to backpedal and clarify.

And the tension mounts!

(AP)

By Meg

I should be happy. Back in November, when I decided to cast my lot for Obama, I remember exactly what I said next: “If he’s still on the ballot in February.” Now he’s all but locked up the nomination. And his opponent ain’t too shabby, either! At the very least, I’m pretty sure that McCain won’t be any worse than Bush (it’s a low bar, but I’ll take it). I should be thrilled.

So why am I so unhappy? Let’s start with how the media, less concerned with journalism than ratings, continues to lament that this primary is cataclysmic for the Democrats and traumatic for voters. How, oh, how will the Dems ever come together after all of this intelligent debate on important issues? How can they possibly heal from these months of free publicity?? My mother talks about how sick she is of this election in the same tone she uses to describe how sick she is of Rachael Ray’s inexplicable overexposure. She’s not the first person I’ve heard make similar comments in similar tones (about the election and about Rachael Ray). It seems to me that we’re following this election the same way we follow American Idol: Here are a few contestants — let’s race ‘em! It’s entertainment! Except that it’s not. Entertaining, certainly, but not entertainment.

There are other things that have contributed to this Jacobean moodiness of mine.

(continued)

MSNBC and CNN are both reporting that Sen. John Edwards will endorse Obama tonight at a campaign event in Michigan.

Never thought I'd see that happen. Guess who'll be glued to her TV tonight!
— Meg

Strange but true: A tattoo artist offered a free inking of Hillary’s face to any takers at a recent tattoo convention in Baltimore. It will certainly hold up longer than a Hillary for President travel mug.

Personally, I’m not letting someone named Buffalo Bill go anywhere near my skin.
— Meg

By Meg

Hillary will win West Virginia tomorrow night by a huge margin (“Oh, really, Meg? How incredibly astute. I never would have guessed that!”). She’ll give a rousing victory speech, but the press will not bite (nor will the superdelegates). I think we all know it’s over.

Since my prediction above was so pathetically obvious, I’m going to make it up to you by throwing out a wild card prediction. After the final primary, the Holy Grail of superdelegates will have his say: Al Gore will endorse Obama, and everyone will finally shut up.

Where will this leave Hillary? As Holly Golightly said, there are certain shades of limelight that can wreck a girl’s complexion. She’ll stand with Barack at the convention, but don’t expect her to be vociferous. I think she’ll quietly go back to the Senate (unless Obama offers her a juicy spot in his administration, which he’d be a fool not to do) and start plotting Comeback 2012.

By Meg

This one’s for you, Jeff and Adrian.

It’s official: Former Congressman Bob Barr is running for president — as a Libertarian! Curious what the two of you think about this. I personally don’t know much about the guy except that he hates former President Clinton and loves marijuana.

Sounds like every philosophy professor I had in college ...

To figure out that the gas-tax suspension plan isn’t going to work?

To quote a co-worker of mine: “I’m going to save thirty dollars? Max? That’s not even going to keep me in cigarettes for the summer.”

Glibness aside, it angers me that McCain and Clinton really think thirty dollars is going to ease the pain felt by Americans forced to spend forty bucks or more to fill up their tanks. Who’s out of touch now?
— Meg

By Meg

Hands down, the biggest spectacle in this election so far has been the Rev. Wright scandal. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Because I’ve exorcised that demon already, though, I’d like to share my favorite bit of ridiculousness thus far: The candidates speak out … on American Idol! What better way to connect with that extremely important demographic of tweens who cannot vote?

If I were judging these appearances Paula Abdul-style, I would anoint McCain the winner for his excellent imitation of that thing called humor. Who else could so successfully pander to the kiddies by combining the charm of that uncle who makes you pull his finger every Thanksgiving with the stiffness and menace of Dr. Evil? He’s hip. He’s with it. Tucka-tucka, tucka-tucka…

It tickles me pink when politicians yuck it up on the talk show circuit. I’m such a child.
-- Meg

(AP)

By Meg

I can’t believe the Reverend Wright scandal is still headline news.

Ridiculous as I found the comments that surfaced last month to be — and ridiculous is the operative word here, as the reverend’s relentlessly dissected speeches on AIDS and 9/11 are so deeply rooted in fiction that they can barely be categorized as opinion — I never felt that they should be held against Obama as a person or as a candidate.

Of course, I am admittedly sympathetic to Obama on this issue; as a Catholic, I am made a witness to the absurd almost every Sunday. Case in point: At a Mass I attended shortly after Hurricane Katrina, the celebrant compared the devastation in New Orleans to the Great Flood of the Old Testament and speculated that God sent such destruction because He was angry at the U.S. for keeping abortion legal. Was I deeply and profoundly offended? Of course. Did I go back to church the next week? For better or for worse, I did.

Because the statements made were, for me, a non-issue (in that it did not change my opinion of Obama as a viable candidate), I was pleased to see the media begin to quiet the Wright chatter. It gave me hope that we could go back to talking about the important issues of this election; you know, trivial things such as health care and the war in Iraq.

So I was a special kind of horrified when I saw Wright’s press conference on Monday. I was welcoming a new co-worker in the lobby of my office when my eye caught the television and the live video of the Reverend gesticulating wildly above a caption that read “Wright: Louis Farrakhan one of the greatest voices of the 20th and 21st centuries.” I immediately stopped, mid-sentence (I’m awesome at my job), to watch the train wreck unfold.

(continued)

(Getty)

Leave it to the Post to blow things out of proportion.
-- Meg

(eBay.com)

Seriously? Yes, seriously.

The owner of Scranton's Glider diner where this plate, silverware and half-eaten waffle were nicked has requested the auctioning of Obama's breakfast (seriously) be suspended. "His DNA is on the silverware"??? But before then, it was going for $10,100 with 31 bids.

As far as we can tell, this is legitimate. Disturbing, but legitimate.

Thanks, Meg.

And the winner will be: Hillary, by ten points. Yep, I’m predicting double digit margins, kids. I’m also predicting that the narrative to immediately come out of the Pennsylvania primary will be overwhelmingly of the “She’s Back!” … “It’s a Knockout!” variety. La Clinton’s campaign will be absolutely sure to revive that very unfortunate Rocky comparison during her celebratory speech, especially if she wins Philadelphia (though I think Philly will shower her brotherly love on Barack).

The narrative in the days to come will shift, however, as the media once again comes to its senses and realizes that Hillary’s win doesn’t actually net any further gains. Still behind in electoral votes. Still behind in the popular vote. Still less states won than Obama. When that reality sinks in, we’ll all be subjected to that ever-reliable “The Dems are destroying the party!”…“You’re killing your poor father!” narrative that we’ve all come to know and tune out.

And we’re on to the next one …
— Meg