The TV Zone

It’s hard to comment on some of today’s St. Patrick’s Day-themed programming without seeming to make the same assumptions as the networks who scheduled the shows. So keep in mind that I’m only the messenger here in reporting that more than one channel seems to think the whole Irish identity comes down to – you guessed it – drinking.

The high-def folks at MOJO sent around press releases boasting about their St. Patrick’s Day salute being a 19-episode marathon of “Three Sheets” (2 p.m.-midnight March 17), Zane Lamprey's globetrotting travelogue of bars, pubs and alcohol offerings. Today's marathon makes stops at (in order) Belgium, Costa Rica, Wales, France, Jamaica, Mexico, Ireland, Belize, Croatia, Japan, Czech Republic, Philippines, Venice, Taipei, Munich, Puerto Rico, South Korea, Kentucky and finally New York City.

Even the History channel is in the drink, using St. Patrick’s Day to premiere a new “Modern Marvels” (8 p.m. March 17) hour about whiskey. Their cameras visit the makers of Jack Daniel’s, Jim Beam, Canadian Club, Jameson's and Glenlivet.

Check out History’s St. Patrick’s Day history, quiz, recipes and videos here. See "Three Sheets" video here.

While my esteemed colleague Verne Gay was taking down names on “Lost” last night, I was taking down numbers.

Sun’s visit to Jin’s (flash-forward) grave revealed a death date on his tombstone, which you could still-frame to read as 9-22-2004 -- the date “Lost” premiered and the date given for the Oceanic 815 crash. So it seems likely Jin didn’t “survive” after all. (Besides, as The Captain on Daddy Widmore’s boat said, all the passengers are “dead,” right? Unless Benjamin Linus had easy access to 300+ substitute corpses. Although knowing Ben . . . )

Another interesting note: While Sun [Yunjin Kim in ABC photo, left] was flashing forward to the delivery of daughter Ji Yeon, husband Jin was busy flashing back to the early days of their marriage. The producers were sneaky -- sure did seem he was buying that giant panda for her while racing to the birth hospital -- but it was actually pretty obvious from the start. Did you get a gander of that GIGANTIC cell phone Jin was carrying? Sooo archaic. Must have been four years old! (Was that the series’ first simultaneously interwoven flash forward/back?)

And whassup with Hurley? The big guy seems to be making the rounds of the farflung Oceanic 6 survivors, serving as the connecting link between them all. Or -- wait a minute -- is that really the real Hurley? Hurley/Hugo? Double-life dude? Doppleganger? Ben Linus turned shapeshifter? And what about Naomi? (Just threw that in for vintage “Electric Company” viewers.)

Sneak a peek at next week here. Or rewatch last night’s episode.

As the big-time eliminations on “American Idol” begin again, here come cable’s “AI” dissection shows.

Wednesdays at 8 (starting March 12), TV Guide Network brings back its highest-rated original series, “Idol Tonight,” hosted by former contenders Kimberly Caldwell and Justin Guarini.

Fox Reality Channel’s “American Idol Extra” returns for a third season Thursday at 7 p.m. (March 13), with new ex-“AI”er cohosts Constantine Maroulis and Gina Glocksen.

TVG’s “Idol Tonight” promises interviews with show cast and crew, along with Idol Flashbacks on auditioners and contestants, Where Are They Now update segments, and Idol Worship viewer questions asked of current contenders.

Fox Reality’s “American Idol Extra” (which has the advantage of being produced by “AI” production companies FremantleMedia and 19 Entertainment) kicks off this week by presenting the ultratalented Melinda Doolittle [right] -- but also William Hung [photo below], singing “Achy Breaky Heart” (oh, my achy breaky ears). Watch/hear a preview, if you dare, at this link.

Just in time for St. Patrick’s Day, WLIW’s “Visions of Ireland” scenic overview comes out on DVD today from Acorn Media (list price $25). The 75-minute widescreen single-disc release includes footage not seen in last year’s public TV premiere.

“Visions of Ireland” joins previous “Visions” releases flying over England, Scotland, Italy, Greece and other locales. WLIW’s latest production, “Visions of Austria,” premiered locally last Thursday and rolls out across other public TV stations this month.

Watch an Ireland DVD video preview here.

Fans of “The L Word” get one more go-round. Showtime announced this morning it’s renewing the hot drama for a sixth and final season, with production resuming this summer. Expect eight concluding episodes in early 2009.

"We are enormously proud of the legacy of ‘The L Word,’ a groundbreaking series that well surpassed its niche as a gay show," says Showtime program chief Bob Greenblatt. "The title of the show became part of the lexicon, and the breadth and reach of the characters and storylines are a testament to the talent of [series creator] Ilene Chaiken and her incredible cast.”

Season 5 episodes of "The L Word" continue to premiere Sundays at 9 p.m.

Now here’s a TV flashback to the time when New York was the center of the video universe, tiny as it was back then. In the late 1940s, as television was replacing radio in a smattering of American homes, nearly all network shows were produced in the city, and reflected the city’s sensibility and ethnicity.

The latter was the point in “The Goldbergs,” a rarely seen early tube familycom that makes its way to DVD April 15 from Timeless Media Group. Gertrude Berg wrote the show, which had originated on radio in the late ’20s, and also starred as Molly Goldberg, leaning out the window of her New York tenement to call her signature line “Yoo-hoo, Mrs. Bloom!”

“The Goldbergs” may have seemed familiar to New Yorkers, or maybe even stereotypical, but to the overwhelmingly Christian center of the country, this radio/TV family provided a rare early glimpse/earful of Jewish life and Yiddish language. The characters of Molly and husband Jake had started in Berg’s Catskills hotel skits as immigrants assimilating into American life, while still proudly retaining their own unique ethnic culture. The show’s radio run (1929-46) even included topical references to Krystallnacht and the Holocaust.

The TV version (run sporadically on four networks 1949-56) was more typically a warm family saga about parents and teens, with an ethnic slant, and its potential success was dampened when costar Philip Loeb was blacklisted in the anti-Communist frenzy. Because the shows were performed live from New York (except a final suburban season filmed for syndication; those episodes are coming to DVD), few have survived to be seen as the historical landmark for which they might be recognized.

You can see clips from the show at the bottom of this tribute page at the ever-tube-lovin’ site TV Party.

Do not adjust your set when you're watching the Federer-Sampras tennis match live next Monday night from Madison Square Garden.

You may think you're watching FSN New York, but you'll be watching the "rebranded" channel MSG Plus. As of that 7 p.m. March 10 event airing live from Madison Square Garden, FSN is being renamed to better fit with its MSG corporate sibling (both owned by Cablevision Systems).

As MSG Plus, the channel will still serve as the cable home for hockey's Islanders and Devils, and will still carry Fox Sports Net original programs like "Best Damn Sports Show" and "Sports Science."

"MSG is a powerful brand," Michael Bair, president of MSG Media, said in today's press release. "Rebranding FSNY as MSG Plus capitalizes on the unprecedented MSG brand value and recognition, and helps to establish a stronger correlation between our two television networks."

So when both the Isles and Devs are playing, do the overflow games go to MSG Plus Plus? MSG Plus 2? (Equals 4?) We shall see . . .

Now that I have your attention . . .

Racy 1930s pre-code features are on tap again tonight on Turner Classic Movies. Before the censors took the reins for Hollywood's "golden age," filmmakers tried getting adult in ways they wouldn't again approach until the 1960s (when they exceeded those ways immeasurably).

It's all explained in tonight's new TCM documentary "Thou Shalt Not: Sex, Sin and Censorship in Pre-Code Hollywood" (Monday, March 3 at 9:30 p.m. and 2:30 a.m.), promising to examine "how the [era's] social, financial and moral forces all helped shape one of the most intriguing periods in Hollywood history." Anybody who's seen Barbara Stanwyck sleep her way to the top of the corporate food chain in 1933's "Baby Face" knows what that means. (You can watch her do it again this Saturday night, March 8 at 12:30 a.m.)

Tonight's lineup:
8 p.m. - "The Divorcee" (1930), with Norma Shearer in a "double standard" expose.
10:45 p.m. - "Night Nurse" (1931), Stanwyck again, with Clark Gable.
12 midnight - "Three on a Match" (1932), with Joan Blondell, Bette Davis and gangsters.
1:15 a.m. - "Female" (1933), Ruth Chatterton as a female CEO "who's used to buying love."
3:45 a.m. - "A Free Soul" (1931), with Lionel Barrymore, Shearer and Gable.

You shouldn't be surprised to learn that TCM's corporate-allied video arm (Warner) is releasing another set of pre-code DVDs tomorrow (March 4). "Forbidden Hollywood Collection, Vol. 2" contains all five of tonight's vintage features.

Did you know that Jackie Gleason had a sitcom before “The Honeymooners”? That he starred in a 1960s Woody Allen movie? That he had a 1980s TV movie reunion with Art Carney?

Everything Gleason is there at a new “online museum” launched last week on what would have been The Great One’s 92nd birthday. JackieGleason.com has a timeline of Gleason’s Broadway, film and TV career, an in-depth biography and, best of all, video clips of many of Gleason’s memorable characters -- not just Ralph Kramden but Reggie Van Gleason III, Joe the Bartender, the pantomime Poor Soul, and more.

It’s a nice place to visit while waiting for WPIX/11’s weekly “Honeymooners” salute to begin March 16. Or for that Allen-scripted movie, “Don’t Drink the Water,” to hit DVD March 18.

We’re still waiting for an official release of his 1949 season on NBC’s “The Life of Riley.” [See photo at right.] His 1985 TV movie “Izzy and Moe” costarring Carney is already on disc and is available for download to Windows users at Amazon Unbox. With two “Color Honeymooners” collections out on DVD from his 1960s Miami Beach variety show, a third one is due May 27.

With so little that’s truly fresh finding its way to network prime-time anymore, you hate to see a scripted series that’s actually ambitious and relevant getting pushed to the back burner.

But that’s what happens this weekend with “Aliens in America,” the CW comedy that used to air in Monday’s 8 p.m. hour, but has now -- to make room for more of those oh-so-profound “reality” programs -- been shunted to the CW’s little-watched Sunday lineup (8:30 on CW/11).

New episodes arrive this weekend and continue through spring, so you can still watch “Aliens” take a swing at great things. Sometimes it whiffs, and sometimes its technique is a little immature, I admit. But what other series dares to plop a Muslim Pakistani teenager into the white-bread midwest of suburban Wisconsin, where two confounded cultures get to learn to get along with each other?

While so many of the reality shows with which The CW now lavishes us (Monday’s “Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious”?) are superficial and mean-spirited, “Aliens” shows folks opening their hearts -- and yes, their minds -- where they don’t have to and maybe don’t want to. Exchange student Raja (Adhir Kalyan) brings a broader world to high school host Justin (Dan Byrd) and family (especially mom Amy Pietz). And Raja learns to understand where Americans are coming from, while still upholding his own firm cultural/religious beliefs.

“Aliens” employs a heightened comic reality that some viewers have found too simplistic, the Americans being ignorant boobs, the Pakistani boy offering precocious wisdom, and most of it being delivered through juvenile antics. But that’s not always true. And it’s certainly not the point. As in its equally warm kid-centered lead-in, “Everybody Hates Chris” (now airing Sundays at 8), people are people, no matter who or what (or where) they are. Instead of fearing the unfamiliar, or jumping to cliched conclusions, these characters celebrate curiosity, compassion and the commonality of us all.

And in this TV era where people are increasingly judged on their looks, celebrity or game-playing ruthlessness, a little slice-of-life centered on the soul is a gift that shouldn’t be overlooked.

[CW photo above: Adhir Kalyan as Raja, Scott Patterson as Gary, Dan Byrd as Justin in "Aliens in America."]

Big week in soapland. On Friday, CBS’ “Guiding Light” goes to a new production model of shooting on-location and in more realistic four-walled sets with handheld cameras, trying to freshen the look of the uber-traditional daytime drama genre.

And this Thursday afternoon at 3, ABC’s “General Hospital” starts climaxing its big Text Message Killer story by employing movie-like special effects to portray victims dangling from rooftops and cars plunging off bridges.

“GH” dabbled in these effects in its late-night SOAPnet spinoff “Night Shift,” and now the green-screen/CGI process makes its way to daytime. If it flies with producers and viewers, the low-budget soaps would be able to stretch their production dollars without costly night/location shoots or crashes/explosions.

“GH” is well-positioned to take advantage of Hollywood effects, since it shoots in a sprawling old movie studio there. (“All My Children” and “One Life to Live” work in cramped Manhattan stages.) Helping create the Text Message Killer climax (running over at least the next three episodes) was Stargate Digital, a visual effects company that also works on such high-profile projects as “Heroes,” “ER” and “Nightmares and Dreamscapes.” Stargate also creates "Ugly Betty's" Manhattan and Queens exterior “location” shots on Hollywood soundstages. (Look real, don’t they?)

See “GH” before and after examples below.

And if you catch their work on “GH” this week, let us know what you think.

You can’t say HBO isn’t trying to support its fascinating new weeknightly shrink drama “In Treatment” with a variety of viewing options. But you can say it’s mind-boggling trying to figure them out.

In addition to each night’s new half-hour 9:30 p.m. episode on the main HBO channel -- Gabriel Byrne’s psychiatrist sees Melissa George on Monday, Blair Underwood [above with Byrne in HBO photo] on Tuesday, Mia Wasikowska on Wednesday, Josh Charles and Embeth Davidtz on Thursday, and Dianne Wiest as his own therapist on Friday -- the series repeats the previous week’s episode/session as a 9 p.m. lead-in. Then HBO repeats the pair at 11 and 11:30 p.m. that night.

Meanwhile, the HBO Signature digital channel runs a day behind for laggards. For instance, Tuesday’s Underwood episodes encore Wednesday at 8 and 8:30 p.m. on HBO Signature.

Then comes the weekend. HBO2 repeats the entire week’s new episodes Saturday 10 p.m.-12:30 a.m. The main HBO channel runs the same mini-marathon Sunday 6:30-9 p.m.

HBO Signature runs an entire week’s episodes, too, on Sunday nights at 9. Except those are three weeks behind. So immediately after the main HBO channel compiles Week Five this Sunday (March 2), you can flip to HBO Signature to watch Week Two.

And don’t forget: The main HBO airings are simulcast on HBO HD and HBO Latino, the latter in Spanish.

P.S.: HBO On Demand viewers can watch any episode from all previous five weeks any time they want.

P.P.S.: Did we mention the two-minute recaps at HBO's web site?

Hope this helps. But I doubt it.

Sunday’s snoozer of an Academy Awards telecast took a nosedive in the Nielsens -- losing more than 8 million viewers from last year's show and 24 percent of its adults 18-49 audience.

More about the numbers here.

Wake me when it’s over. The Academy Awards not only went on and on last night, but went nowhere. They solved the writers’ strike to salvage this?

At least it wasn’t the writers’ fault. The producers and other ultimate decision-makers of this year’s Oscarcast made such brilliant choices as to kick off the night with the award for costume design -- excuse me, everybody knows you start with one of the supporting acting awards -- and went downhill from there. (For the record, it wasn’t till 45 minutes in that Spanish actor Javier Bardem won best supporting actor for “No Country for Old Men.”)

Even when they tried to do interesting things, they did them badly. The intercut clips of vintage winners’ reminiscences -- clearly a leftover from strike plans to fill time with anythingeverything -- were not only half-hearted, but half-brained. Barbra Streisand talks about the wild tie on the night she won for “Funny Girl,” and you don’t say whom she tied with? (Katharine Hepburn in 1968’s “The Lion in Winter.”) A montage of great on-stage Oscar moments builds to the climax of Charlie Chaplin getting his honorary award in 1972, and there’s no context, no mentioning his enormous impact on the industry in its infancy, and no backstory that he’d been run out of the country by the 1950s communist witchhunt and hadn’t set foot here in two decades? For that matter, there was no perspective given to Sidney Poitier remembering his historic 1963 win for “Lilies of the Field,” the first lead trophy for a black performer, in the heat of the civil rights movement.

This was an Oscars for the insiders, not movie fans. You had to know why you were watching what you were watching. And you had to have seen the nominated films, which this year were hardly big-time crowdpleasers. We can’t say host Jon Stewart and his writers didn’t warn us, kicking off the proceedings with a joke about nominating “psychopathic killer movies. Thank god for teen pregnancy” was the punchline of that (referencing best script winner “Juno”), which made clear what kind of night we were fated to suffer.

And then there was Jack Nicholson, the Oscarcast director’s great fallback, seen preening in sunglasses as a Hollywood “character” whose persona was cool, maybe, 25 years ago. Yet he’s still in the front row for no reason, in sunglasses for no reason, a joke target for the reason of laziness. (Do they not know that to a younger generation he just seems a dirty old man?) Please. Stop it. Stop it now.

The best moments were, pretty much the antithesis of I-am-hip Jack, the spontaneous, heartfelt ones. The honorary Oscar to 98-year-old production designer Robert Boyle, whose speech was a valentine to the art of movies, not the industry, also included a clip reel so wide-ranging as to be awe-inspiring -- from such 1940s classics as “Saboteur” through the ’60s suspenser “The Birds” on to John Wayne’s 1976 valedictory western “The Shootist” and up to the 1987 parody “Dragnet.“ Boyle was elegant, and eloquent. [At right: Boyle's work on "North by Northwest."]

Jon Stewart shone, too, when he became not a joke teller but an honest reactor. Clearly moved by the best song Oscar to Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova (“Once”), he not only admired their excited humility (“Wow, that guy is so arrogant,” he deadpanned in wonder) but brought back Irglova after the commercial break to finish her acceptance speech cut off by the keep-it-moving orchestra.

But then it was almost another hour of filler -- documentary short subject, as time runs down? -- before the “biggies” of best actor, director, picture. Any time this Oscarcast seemed about to gain momentum, another wacky producers’ decision would strangle it. But then the year in movies pretty much did the same thing. Sorry, but Americans tend toward the parochial, and most movie fans are just not going to care about Englishman Daniel Day-Lewis (he beat George Clooney and Johnny Depp!) or France’s Marion Cotillard or Spain’s Bardem or Britain’s Tilda Swinton. Even the animated feature winner had a foreign name (“Ratatouille”).

Maybe next year. Wake me up for it.

Well, every week can’t be last week. After that thrilling Sayid episode, “Lost” calmed itself down last night. No assassinations, forbidden love affairs, shocking betrayals or revelations, really. Even that last-second “reveal” of perhaps another one of the Oceanic Six turned out to be a bit of a dud. Of course, nobody said it had to be a character with tons of dialogue. Or any. (Heh-heh.)

The episode was Kate-centric, which reminds me why the first half of last season was soooo annoying. When love-tangled Kate is supposed to be a catalyst, the show starts shutting down emotionally. (Ironic, no?) That whole Jack-or-Sawyer dilemma was a distraction that drove me batty, and setting it in driving rainstorms in zoo cages didn’t exactly perk things up. Last night’s flash forward to Kate’s post-rescue travails was also numbing stuff. So she’s on trial for killing dear old dad. Is this news? Could it be more blandly delivered? How expressionless can actress Evangeline Lilly get? Ditto Matthew Fox? How anybody can care if these two uptight characters get together or not is beyond me. Put them under fluorescent light, and they’re even more dreary.

And all this futureworld mopery is taking time away from the meaty happenings back on the present-day island. “I’m exactly where I wanna be,” said Miles, the psychic helicopter dude held prisoner by Locke’s tribe, who wanted to speak to former island biggie Ben, another captive. Ken Leung and Michael Emerson may be the two current most interesting actors in this mix, so things could have heated up. But theirs was a fleeting meeting. It was Locke who came between them, though, and Terry O’Quinn is another fascinating soul, proclaiming last night “I’m responsible for the well-being of this island.” Never mind the castaways on it.

There were more hints about the fracturing of the time/space continuum, or alternate realities, or whatever mumbojumbo you wanna call it, with Miles saying to Kate, “Who knows, maybe you didn’t survive the crash.” And the helicopter carrying Sayid and Desmond hasn’t arrived at the supposed rescue boat, even though it left “last night.”

Others can parse the meaning of the $3.2 million dollars Miles tried to blackmail from Ben, and other persnickety clues. My interest will never be that detailed. But the power of the island does intrigue me, along with its ability to shape the societies that exist upon it. Only eight passengers “survived” the crash, we’re told. Does that mean some stayed and some returned to civilization? Did Kate “survive” or not? What the heck IS Ben’s deal? Whassup with Miles and the rest of his study group? And how come future Jack wants to go back?

It can’t be only to screen Hurley’s VHS copy of “Xanadu.”

[Above: Terry O'Quinn and Michael Emerson in ABC photo from March 6 episode of "Lost."]

Seems Showtime is luring more and more unique talents who made their names at HBO. This may be the biggest.

Edie Falco has signed with Showtime to star in a new “single-camera dark comedy” about an “iconoclastic New York City nurse juggling the frenzied grind of an urban hospital and an equally challenging personal life.”

The personal-life drama she has down, of course, from six seasons of HBO’s “The Sopranos.” But the nurse gig adds a workplace dimension. “My time on ‘The Sopranos’ was so rich and so full, the challenge has been finding something else that would excite me,” Falco said in Showtime’s announcement today. “This character and the writing are truly thrilling.”

Preproduction starts immediately, Showtime says, for shooting to take place in New York. Creators are Liz Brixius and Linda Wallem. And wouldn’t you know it, in addition to writing credits on “That ’70s Show” and “Cybill,” Wallem’s resume also includes producing on Lisa Kudrow’s uncomfortable but underrated HBO comedy “The Comeback.”

Showtime already has a host of HBO refugees. Michael C. Hall of “Six Feet Under” stars now on Showtime’s hit “Dexter.” Sketch comic Tracey Ullman has brought over her chameleon self for a new series premiering March 30 (right after the second season return of “The Tudors”). And the British series sensation “Secret Diary of a Call Girl,” starring “Doctor Who” blonde Billie Piper, was imported for a June 16 Showtime premiere by former HBO programmer turned production packager Chris Albrecht.

Falco's new series should fit right in with the likes of "Weeds" and "Californication" as Showtime continues exploring the far reaches of TV comedy. And let's not forget Showtime was there in the past, too, creating such '80s comedy groundbreakers as "Brothers" and "It's Garry Shandling's Show."

[Above: NBC photo of Edie Falco with Alec Baldwin on "30 Rock" last fall.]

“Heath Ledger: A Tragic End” looks back at the Australia native’s life, busy movie (and TV) career, and Jan. 22 death in Manhattan. E! News’ Jason Kennedy hosts the special Friday (Feb. 22) at 8 p.m. on E!

While the title seems to focus on the 28-year-old actor’s drug-related demise one month ago, E! promises the half-hour also explores his “great risks as an actor, in a kaleidoscope of diverse roles from a conflicted cowboy in ‘Brokeback Mountain’ to the maniacal Joker in the soon to be released ‘Batman the Dark Knight.’”

Some of those roles hit the air this weekend. Ledger plays Mel Gibson’s son in “The Patriot” (Saturday at 2:15 p.m. on 5StarMax, Sunday at 8:15 a.m. on ActionMax), Australian outlaw “Ned Kelly” (Saturday at 10 p.m. on Sundance), and Billy Bob Thornton's prison guard son in “Monster’s Ball” (Sunday at 9:30 a.m. on BIO).

Now we await ABC getting into the game. This week, both NBC and CBS announced massive new web streams of full episodes of vintage TV shows.

NBC.com has launched a Way Back Wednesdays page featuring episodes of such NBC Universal library series as “Miami Vice,” “Emergency,” “Buck Rogers” and “The A-Team.” (Who doesn’t need to see Mr. T in “Mexican Slayride”?)

Sci Fi.com, ChillerTV.com and SleuthChannel.com are other NBC-owned channel sites planned to start vintage streaming this month. Expect shows like “Tek War” and “Night Gallery” (SciFi.com), “The Alfred Hitchcock Hour” and “Swamp Thing” (ChillerTV.com), and “Kojak” and “Simon & Simon” (SleuthChannel.com).

CBS.com’s new Television Classics list taps the CBS Library (vintage Paramount and CBS shows) for episodes of “The Twilight Zone,” “Hawaii Five-O,” “Star Trek” and “Melrose Place.” Even “MacGyver,” for you “MythBusters” fans.

The CBS shows are also available through “more than 300 Web sites currently making up the CBS Audience Network,” says the press release, including “partners such as AOL, Microsoft, CNET Networks, Comcast, Joost, Bebo, Netvibes, Sling Media and Veoh and social application partners including Automattic, Brightcove, Clearspring, DAVE Networks, Goowy Media, meebo, MeeVee, Musestorm, Ning, RockYou!, Slide, VideoEgg, Voxant and vSocial, as well as Web sites from CBS's owned television, radio, and affiliated stations.” (Think they missed anybody?)

But nothing comes free, does it? While these vintage streams don’t cost anything to watch, they do come ad-supported. Sorry, no escaping commercials.

Did we forget to list the Fox returnees? (And newbies.) Let us rectify.

Back to You – Original episodes air next Tuesday-Wednesday, Feb. 26-27 at 9:30. But the Kelsey Grammer-Patricia Heaton TV news sitcom then goes away again until Wednesday, April 16’s “time period premiere” at 8:30.

Unhitched – Sunday, March 2 at 9:30 p.m. for new Farrelly Brothers sitcom.

New Amsterdam – Tuesday, March 4 and Thursday, March 6 “preview” episodes of immortal NYC homicide detective; time period premiere is Monday, March 10 at 9.

Canterbury’s Law – Monday, March 10 at 8 p.m., a strangely early hour for Julianna Margulies’ dark NYC-filmed legal hour.

The Return of Jezebel James – Friday, March 14 at 8 p.m. for hour premiere of sisters comedy from “Gilmore Girls” creator Amy Sherman-Palladino; time period premiere Friday, March 21 at 8:30.

’Til Death – Tuesday, March 25 at 9:30 for original episode; time period premiere Wednesday, April 16 at 8 p.m.

Hell’s Kitchen – Tuesday, April 1 at 9 p.m. season premiere of Gordon Ramsay chef show

Bones – Monday, April 14 at 8 p.m.

House – Monday, April 21 at 9 p.m. time period premiere with encore; originals resume Monday, April 28.

Note that Fox’ New Orleans drama “K-Ville” isn’t mentioned here as going back into production.

And “24” stays on hold. The show will “conclude production on its seventh season,” the network says, but that adventure “will not premiere until January 2009, allowing the drama to once again run 24 episodes consecutively.”

“Lost” will have lots of company by April as new episodes return to ABC’s lineup for such faves as “Desperate Housewives” and “Ugly Betty.” In the midst of the post-strike shuffle, “Lost” will move back to 10 p.m. Thursday behind a returning “Grey’s Anatomy” – just in time for May’s Nielsen sweep (April 24 - May 21).

The network has announced the following fresh-episode dates:

“Samantha Who?” - Monday, April 7 at 9:30 p.m. (six new episodes)

“Boston Legal” - Tuesday, April 8 at 10 p.m. (six episodes)

“Desperate Housewives” - Sunday, April 13 at 9 p.m. (five episodes, plus two-hour finale)

“Brothers & Sisters” - Sunday, April 20 at 10 p.m. (four episodes)

“Ugly Betty” - Thursday, April 24 at 8 p.m. (five episodes)

“Grey’s Anatomy” - Thursday, April 24 at 9 p.m. (five episodes)

“Lost” - Thursday, April 24 move to 10 p.m. (five episodes)

Catch up to previous episodes at ABC's streaming media player.

AMC’s hot new comedy-drama breaks the rules this week over on sister cabler IFC. “Breaking Bad Uncut & Uncensored” airs Friday (Feb. 22) at 9-11 p.m., presenting the acclaimed series’ first two episodes in a “director’s cut” and without commercial interruption.

The latter is possibly the best news, because “Breaking Bad” weaves a web of both character suspense and black comedy that benefits mightily from uninterrupted immersion. The “uncensored” boast may not make as much difference, but be aware the channel is labeling this airing with a TV rating of MA for sex, language and violence.

IFC also passes along this handy translation for the behavior of Bryan Cranston as the New Mexico chemistry teacher and cancer victim who decides to devote his remaining time to cooking some fine crystal meth, with tragic yet horrifyingly hilarious consequences:

“BREAK BAD: To behave in a violent, wanton, or outrageous manner for no discernible reason.”
- The Complete How to Speak Southern

In the meantime, “BB” homeland AMC is sneaking a peek of this Sunday’s (Feb. 24) 10 p.m. fifth episode at the series’ home page. The first two episodes are streaming there, too.

Who’s dancing who?

Here’s who, from ABC's “Dancing With the Stars” pairings announcement on this morning’s “Good Morning America”:

ADAM CAROLLA & JULIANNE HOUGH – The big mouth and the cutie pie.

SHANNON ELIZABETH & DEREK HOUGH – Julianne’s brother gets another Jennie Garth-type.

CRISTIÁN DE LA FUENTE & CHERYL BURKE – The telenovela star is a waaaay better deal for multi-champ Cheryl than last year’s Wayne Newton.

STEVE GUTTENBERG & ANNA TREBUNSKAYA – Anna is married to professional dancer Jonathan Roberts, who gets . . .

MONICA SELES & JONATHAN ROBERTS – Let’s hope Monica doesn’t faint. (Jonathan had to catch Marie Osmond last season.)

PENN JILLETTE & KYM JOHNSON – Well, if Kym could cope with Jerry Springer . . .

MARIO & KARINA SMIRNOFF – Another Mario for Karina, who previously taught Mario Lopez.

MARLEE MATLIN & FABIAN SANCHEZ – The professional newcomer is, according to ABC, “the 2006 World Mambo Champion, a four-time Fred Astaire National Champion and the United States Rising Star, and the 1999 American Rhythm Champion.” But can he sign?

PRISCILLA PRESLEY & LOUIS VAN AMSTEL – Priscilla seems a less likely musical mover than Monique Coleman, Louis’ previous partner.

MARISSA JARET WINOKUR & TONY DOVOLANI – At least this Broadway babe has a head start in movement over Jane Seymour.

JASON TAYLOR & EDYTA SLIWINSKA – Two hot numbers, together at last!

KRISTI YAMAGUCHI & MARK BALLAS – Mark got robbed with Sabrina Bryan last time.

Their stepping starts on ABC March 17.

“American Idol” arrives on iTunes today with a free video download of white fright Renaldo Lapuz bowing to Ryan Seacrest, the better to whet your appetite for more.

(That’s “your” appetite. Not mine.)

But the main iTunes attraction, which you gotta pay for, is the availability of all musical performances by the top 24 contenders in Hollywood (presented in alphabetical order by first name, since we’re all BFFs). For 99 cents a pop -- that’s per person, per song -- these audio stylings become available the morning after each telecast, the better to grab your money before your brain kicks in to rethink the cost. (You can even “pre-order” downloads to avoid thought altogether.)

But don’t look for competition clues by whose downloads sell most. Sorry, “iTunes and Fox are committed to presenting contestants in a fair and balanced manner online and on-air,” reads the small print. “For this reason, sales of performances from ‘American Idol’ contestants from the current season will not be reflected in the iTunes charts.”

They’ll be happy to post and profit, however, from sales of previous seasons’ tunes, in case you just haven’t had enough of Clay Aiken’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water.”

More details here.

Oh, dear. If only Kenny Mayne in sparkly eye shadow were half as amusing as the sad little sportscaster thinks he is. If only "Dance War" were one-tenth as enjoyable as those screaming-Meemies in the audience pretend it is. If only network television weren't circling the drain in the commode at this very moment.

But I digress.

Just minutes ago, ABC announced the cast of this spring's "Dancing With the Stars" during Monday night's two-hour finale of "Dance War." (Please, please, make it go away now. Forever. "Solid Gold" reruns would be better.)

The newbies hitting the "DWTS" floor as of March 17:

Deaf actress Marlee Matlin ("The West Wing," photo at right) – How much do we love this choice? Martin Sheen next!

Elvis ex Priscilla Presley (late of "Dallas") – Take THAT, Heather Mills! (Or should we be saying that about Marlee? Never mind.)

Penn Jillette, crabby magician/debunker – I know who I'm cheering for right now. Tom Bergeron, watch your back.

Adam Carolla, ex-"The Man Show"/radio big-mouth – I am so, so sorry, Julianne Hough.

Kristi Yamaguchi, Olympic skating star – And what happens if hubby Bret Hedican's Carolina Hurricanes make the NHL playoffs just as "DWTS" hits its climax? What then?!

NFL hottie Jason Taylor – The Miami Dolphins defensive end has great abs. (Evidence in photo at right.) I think "DWTS" drooler Lisa Rinna mentioned this six or 12 times in announcing his casting. Imagine the costume possibilities. (Take THAT, Kenny Mayne!)

Tennis (ex-)star Monica Seles – Well, she did play herself on that episode of "The Nanny."

Marissa Jaret Winokur, Broadway's "Hairspray" – She survived costarring opposite Pamela Anderson on "Stacked." Anything is possible.

Steve Guttenberg, "Three Men and a Baby" – Once he's back on the radar, beware "Police Academy 17." Or "Meet the Santas 7."

R&B singer Mario – Let America love him.

Shannon Elizabeth – Bye, bye, Miss American Pie.

Christian De La Fuente – Chilean-born telenovela heartthrob. Who?

[UPDATED with photo and May 20 release date]

Nothing new to report on the Fox TV network return of The Further Adventures of Jack Bauer. But since it looks unlikely we’ll see anything “24” on-air till 2009, Fox Home Entertainment has stepped into the breach.

A tricked-out Special Edition release of “24” Season 1 is being reported at our favorite TV DVD site, TV Shows on DVD. Fans will remember the show’s initial set didn’t get many special features -- it came out back in 2002 right when networks/studios were starting to realize the $$ to be made (and promotional value to be found) by rushing out the previous season release before subsequent episodes resumed the following fall/winter. And that was before bonus material was being created along the way during production.

TV Shows on DVD is reporting new commentary tracks to be added for Season 1, along with deleted scenes and featurettes about the series’ genesis. This special "24" set should hit shelves May 20.

Last week's second-season premiere of "Jericho" can be downloaded free from iTunes, for watching on-computer or on the go.

That should bring everybody up to speed before tomorrow night's second installment (Tuesday, Feb. 19 at 10 p.m. on CBS), which introduces the new president of the -- gasp -- Allied States of America.

[Hail to the Chief, above: Mayor Anderson (Michael Gaston) and Eric Green (Kenneth Mitchell) with President Tomarchio (George Newbern) in "Condor" episode of "Jericho." CBS photo by Cliff Lipson.]

Formats come and formats go in home video. It looks pretty much as if HD DVD is on its way out now, according to today’s report that inventor Toshiba is primed to pull the plug. (Blu-ray remains in the high-def game.) But portable digital media continue booming on the iPod and similar devices, where downloads and podcasts keep us busy watching on the go.

Now add downloads on a disc, as the Fox home entertainment folks have with their new release of “Family Guy: Blue Harvest.” The animated series’ hourlong “Star Wars” parody special arrives on DVD bearing a duplicate Digital Copy of itself that’s ready to be loaded into your computer library for transfer to iPod or Windows Media Player.

When I finally found the time to try it out, turned out I hardly needed any time at all. You put the “Blue Harvest” Digital Copy disc into the computer, type in the serial number provided in disc-case documentation, and click a button. Two minutes later, the entire show has downloaded to your hard drive (in 640-by-480 quality). Then connect your iPod to that computer, press the transfer button, and 60 seconds later, you can watch anywhere.

Without Digital Copy, you could of course rip a regular DVD’s content and translate that onto a portable device using third-party software. But that’s a pain and requires some know-how. With a Digital Copy DVD, you’ve already got the content in two consumer-friendly, guaranteed-legal formats.

Other DVDs with pod-formatted Digital Copy content include “Live Free or Die Hard” and “Harry Potter: The Order of the Phoenix.”

Here’s a more detailed MacWorld report on the process. And here's the official "Family Guy" version.

You know what’s great about “Lost”? OK, one of the many things that’s great about “Lost”? It’s such an international stew of various ethnicities. And on this show, that’s really no big deal.

Last night’s jaw-dropping new ABC episode (SPOILERS AHEAD) had a thrillingly meaty “flash-forward” for Sayid, played by Indian-Brit Naveen Andrews. Our favorite Iraqi ex-“torturer” seems fated, upon his return as the fourth revealed member of the “Oceanic Six,” to become some kind of besieged assassin for baddie (or is he?) Ben.

The episode “The Economist” (“He’s not really an economist”) also continued the storyline for mysterious new “psychic” helicopter arrival Miles, played by Chinese-American Ken Leung. And let’s not forget two other longtime Asian-ethnicity cast members, South Korea-born Daniel Dae Kim and Yunjin Kim.

Four Asian actors prominently featured on one show? That’s gotta be some kind of record.

“Lost” also has several key black performers in not-quite-departed ex-regulars Harold Perrineau (Michael) and Malcolm David Kelley (Walt), plus Marsha Thomason (“Las Vegas”) as this season’s is-she-really-dead mercenary Naomi. You can probably add Lance Reddick (“The Wire”) to the list as the forbidding airline “lawyer” in recent flash-forwards, who looks to be around for awhile.

And how about Jorge Garcia (Hurley/Hugo) and the underused Nestor Carbonell (never-aging “Others” mastermind Richard)?

As for last night’s episode, if you missed it, or just loved it lots, you can read a concisely detailed recap here. And/or you can watch it here.

[Above: Ken Leung, Evangeline Lilly, Naveen Andrews in ABC photo from Feb. 14, 2008 episode of "Lost."]

When is a rerun not a rerun? When it’s “enhanced”!

“Lost” first figured this out and now precedes each new ABC Thursday 9 p.m. episode with a time-filling 8 p.m. repeat “enhanced” with facts, figures and “clues” that pop-up like old-time VH1 video trivia. (VH1 ran videos? How weird!)

Tonight, “Ghost Whisperer” jumps on the texting bandwagon at 8 p.m., running "Love Notes" that promise “production secrets and fun facts” (such as: “Jim and Melinda's house is on the Universal Studios back lot. It was originally built as Gregory Peck's house in ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’”). Expect ’em on the episodes repeating on CBS both Feb. 15 (8 p.m.) and Feb. 22 (9 p.m.).

Also factually enhancing reruns: CBS’ “CSI: Miami,” adding "Bullet Points" the next two Mondays (Feb. 18 and 25 at 10 p.m.).

More series return dates are being announced in the wake of the writers’ strike concluding. These are from Fox:

“Hell’s Kitchen” – Tuesday, April 1 at 9 p.m.

“So You Think You Can Dance” – Thursday, May 22 at 8-10 p.m. and Wednesday, May 28 at 8-10 p.m.

“Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” – Sunday, June 1 at 7 p.m.

“The Moment of Truth” – Thursday, June 12 at 8 p.m.

And a new unscripted role-reversal series tentatively titled “When Women Rule the World” – Monday, June 2 at 8-10 p.m., then Mondays at 9.

Finally, something worth watching on Saturday night network TV! For one weekend, anyway.

This week’s second-season premiere of “Jericho” will now repeat on CBS Saturday (Feb. 16) at 8 p.m. -- perhaps a tiny test of whether the series now airing Tuesdays at 10 should return to an earlier time slot. I can’t be the only critic getting emails from parents outraged that their kids’ once-favorite show has returned at a weeknight hour too late for them to stay up for.

The episode is also streaming online at CBS’ extensive “Jericho” site, either with or without commentary.

[Above: "Jericho" star Skeet Ulrich and cast addition Esai Morales in CBS photo.]

Breaking up is hard to do. Especially when it's over the phone.

Apparently, that's how the cast of "Girlfriends" [above in 2003 photo] got the news this week that The CW has decided not to put the series back into production after the writers' strike, according to this Black Voices blog entry.

Kind of a surprising fadeaway, considering what a stalwart job the sitcom has done for first UPN and then CW over the past eight seasons. While never a huge critical or audience hit, "Girlfriends" was a reliable performer in both those arenas. And the network seems to be letting this longtime building block die without even a proper goodbye (though internet rumors are flying that a series finale might still be possible).

More at the TV Series Finale site.

UPDATE AT 3:30 PM - "Girlfriends" creator Mara Brock Akil has issued this statement through the CBS Paramount production studio: "Although it's always difficult to say goodbye, I choose to focus my energy on the history that 'Girlfriends' has made, the human stories that we told, the beautifully complex images that we projected and the blessings 172 episodes bestowed on us, both personally and professionally. I am immensely thankful to the amazingly talented cast, writers, directors, staff and crew for their endless dedication and hard work for eight seasons, to the network that always wanted us and the studio that always supported us, but mostly to the audience, especially African-American women, who took the time to tune into us every Monday night at nine to have a dialogue with us and who have been our partner in this journey. I am currently in talks with the studio and network on putting together a retrospective show which will honor and celebrate this landmark series, so please stay tuned."

If you didn't see today's "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" installment, we're here to tell you that West Babylon's Mark Czachor walked away with $100,000.

The Garden City science teacher and wrestling coach phoned a friend on the question, “A famous poem by William Carlos Williams reads, 'So much depends upon a red wheelbarrow glazed with rain water beside the' what? A) Wet ducklings, B) Green pasture, C) Rusty fence post, D) White chickens.” (Correct answer: D.)

But he knew better than to guess on the $250,000 question, “Equivalent to twenty bottles, which of these large bottles of champagne holds the greatest volume? A) Balthazar, B) Jeroboam, C) Methuselah, D) Nebuchadnezzar.” (Correct answer: D.) So he took the money and ran.

More locals: Tomorrow's "Millionaire" (12:30 p.m. Wednesday, Feb. 13 on WABC/7) features Mount Sinai attorney John Leonard, while Friday's (Feb. 15) show welcomes Merrick's John Yandrasits.

There’s nothing like banning something to ensure it gets seen everywhere fast in viral form.

“The Boondocks” is the latest example, with two completed episodes of Aaron McGruder’s late-night animated satire fated not to be seen during the show’s current season in Cartoon Network’s adult swim block ("Boondocks" airs Monday nights at 11:30 and midnight).

BET cable executives take the brunt of it in unaired clips now making the rounds on YouTube and other streaming sites. Strangely enough, one of the most mocked folks, BET’s “super-duper smart Harvard-educated president of entertainment” Reginald Hudlin, is also credited as an executive producer of “Boondocks,” a result of his helping get the original pilot made for Fox before the Cartoon pickup. Hudlin’s cartoon parody self is mostly concerned with making sure BET is the place for black viewers to see every “[crummy] black version of an MTV reality show” presented as simply as possible for "the monosyllabic demographic."

BET chief executive Debra Lee gets the worst savaging, as a Dr. Evil character named Debra Lee-vil, dedicated to trying to “accomplish what hundreds of years of slavery, Jim Crow and malt liquor couldn’t -- the destruction of black people!” -- while “suckin’ up [N-word people’s] money,” of course.

Ouch.

McGruder’s show has frequently courted controversy with touchy racial epithets and would-be Martin Luther King Jr. scenarios since its 2005 debut. But directly attacking another cable network in personal terms? Apparently a no-no, which seems to have shortened the second “Boondocks” season from a planned 15 episodes to 13.

But the BET trashing is nothing new or surprising for the 33-year-old McGruder, who’s always had it in for what he sees as the channel’s sleazy racial stereotypes, as widely demonstrated in his Boondocks newspaper comic strip.

Of course Advertising Age speculates the episodes’ ban might feed into another nifty viral feat -- a DVD marketing campaign -- when it comes to the future release of the second-season “Boondocks” set.

Judge for yourself here.

Great chance this week to catch up to one of the season’s best new drama-comedy creations.

“Breaking Bad” gets a three-episode mini-marathon from AMC this Wednesday (Feb. 13), 8-11 p.m. The series’ first three hours set up the story of a high school chemistry teacher who gets into the crystal meth business for the weirdest of reasons.

But this is the weirdest of shows -- a sort of warm weather “Fargo” taking place in the New Mexico desert, all dry humor and deadly action, rolled together into a quirky adult concoction.

It’s also got the breakout performance of the year from Bryan Cranston [in AMC photo at right], who always had a deft touch as the hapless dad of “Malcolm in the Middle,” but here gets to broaden his range more acutely. Cranston wrings tragedy out of black humor, making us feel his pain even as we laugh at its absurdity. Smart stuff.

“Breaking Bad” regularly airs new episodes on AMC Sunday night at 10. There’s also a superb web site crammed with video and games. (Episodes 1 and 2 are still streaming there. All episodes also available as paid downloads at iTunes, where there's also a free making-of featurette.)

In the midst of strike on/off meetings and madness, the Writers Guild actually found time this weekend to announce the winners of its annual Writers Guild Awards. No big ceremony shindig this time, though. Guess they’ve got something else to deal with.

The TV winners include:

Dramatic series – “The Wire” (HBO, photo above).
Comdy series – “30 Rock” (NBC).
New series – “Mad Men” (AMC).
Episodic drama – “The Sopranos” episode “The Second Coming” (HBO).
Episodic comedy – “The Office” episode “The Job” (NBC).
Long form, original – “Pandemic” movie (Hallmark).
Long form, adaptation – “The Company” (TNT).
Animation – “The Simpsons” episode “Kill Gil” (Fox).
Comedy/variety – “The Colbert Report” (Comedy Central).
Daytime serial – “The Young and the Restless” (CBS).
Children’s script – “Flight 29 Down” episode “Look Who’s Not Talking” (Discovery Kids).
Children’s long form/special – “Johnny Kapahala: