That's right, folks, it is Tom Cruise's birthday today. Quite the fortuitous discovery seeing how this is still Tom Cruise Week here at Pet Rock. Wish we could say we knew it all along, but that would be a bigger lie than "Lions for Lambs" was a great movie.
But before we light up Tommy Boy in YouTube Friday, we'll support the cause with a look at his top 5 movies in our opinion.
5) All the Right Moves
Can high school football player Tom Cruise escape the tough coach and the steel mill and land a college scholarship? Seeing how this movie was made before 1992, you know he can.
4) Born on the Fourth of July
Good movie, great mustache!
3) Risky Business
The quintessential coming of age movie for dudes, this movie just gets better with time. And Rebecca De Mornay never looked better!
2) A Few Good Men
Do we really need to ask if you ordered the code red or can han handle the truth?
1) Top Gun
That's right, a naval aviator. We were inverted. She's lost that loving feeling. I feel the need, the need for speed. You're three-quarters of a mile out, call the ball, Maverick.
OK, we'll stop now. It has been 22 years and "Top Gun" is still among the best guy movies ever.
Lil' Wayne dropped his new album "Tha Carter III" this week and it set off some alarms in the Pet Rock office. Adam "Weezie" Abramson professed his adoration for the rapper and all things dirty dirty.
While I acknowledge the effect the Dirty South has had on the rap game, I feel it's my job to educate the junior Pet Rocker and all those out there who believe Weezie is the best rapper of all time.
He's not even close. That's not a dig at him at all, so don't misunderstand. He's got skills (I still recite his verse on "Bling Bling" when need be -- usually once a week), but the five seminal voices of rap came when rocking the bling was called flossing and when there were only old R&B and soul albums to sample from.
In what I believe to be the most entertaining conversation among those raised in the hip -hop generations, I will proudly list my top 5 rap MCs of all time. What the heck, it is Top 5 Thursday anyway, so it makes even more sense.
I stand firmly behind all five, in the order listed, but fully respect everyone's opinion on the matter. Comment instructions are below the list, as are my honorable mentions and a video playlist. Understand that on Top 5 Thursday, we only have room for five (hence the name, so don't overreact to those missing. Rather, make your case in the comments. This is not about who made the biggest-selling songs or the best club-bangers. This isn't voting for the all-star game. This is voting for the Hall of Fame.
5) Guru
Do we begin with "Lemonade was a popular drink and it still is, I get more props and stunts than Bruce Willis?" Or should we start with "Don't wanna play the field because I got lovin' at home base?" Or maybe "Furthermore, I implore, that as a soldier of war, I go in only to win, and be the holder of more . . . trophies and titles and triumphs." Backed by DJ Premier, the greatest beat creator ever, Guru was authoritative on the mic and owns a somewhat raspy voice that no one can come close to replicating. Perhaps not the biggest name in terms of mass appeal, true rap heads take it personal when Guru gets slighted by so many.
4) Tupac
Joke all you want about how he put out more albums after his death almost 12 years ago than while he was alive: Tupac controlled the microphone as good as anyone on this list. He was controversial, but I believe that was more of a state of the times in the early 1990s and the public's backlash toward gangsta rap. Tupac had more range in his raps than he gets credit for. In the Biggie vs. Tupac battle -- musically speaking, that is -- Tupac wins.
3) KRS-One
The teacher. The philosopher. The rapper. The freestyler. KRS-One had the bravado and the presence to back it up. On Funkmaster Flex's 1995 CD "60 Minutes of Funk, Vol. I," KRS-One closed it out with a freestyle.
He proclaimed:
"I bet they'll mention me
In the next century
'KRS-One innovator in early rap poetry'
Simultaneously, you will be forgotten
In the year 2000, 'Criminal Minded' will still be rockin'."
Well, in the year 2008 and every year afterward, "Criminal Minded" will still be rockin'. The song was released in 1987.
2) Chuck D
Arguably the most powerful voice to ever rock the mic, Chuck D can still shake the foundation. Not many rappers can produce socially conscious music and classic hits in the same song. Chuck D could. Every time I hear him on "Welcome to the Terrordome," "Fight the Power," "You're Gonna Get Yours" and "Brothers Gonna Work It Out," I wish I had seen Public Enemy in concert during its heyday.
1) Rakim
Anyone who argues against Rakim as the greatest microphone fiend of all-time should be forced to have his or her jaw wired for 12 years. Need proof? "Paid in Full" is one freakin' verse, and it's a gold standard for rap music.
Need more proof? OK, here goes:
• "It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you with a dope beat to step to."
• "Thought I was a donut, you tried to glaze me."
• "Thinkin' of a master plan, there ain't nothin but sweat inside my hand."
• "I'll take 7 emcees, put 'em in a line. And add 7 more brothers who think they can rhyme. Well, it'll take another 7 before I go for mine, now that's 21 emcees ate up at the same time."
Below is a video playlist of some of these rappers' work. (Note: I scoured YouTube late into the night to find as many clean edits as possible. In some cases, the original version is used because the song is integral to the artist, so this is our parental-advisory warning sticker.)
Pet Rock also welcomes your comments on this list, as well as your top 5 lists. Let's hear your case for them, too. I always love this conversation, so let's get it going and no hating allowed.
Honorable Mention (listed alphabetically): Big Daddy Kane, LL Cool J, MC Lyte, Nas, Notorious B.I.G., Q-Tip.
We've been hearing about "Iron Man" (see below for video and showtimes) for roughly the past three years. Tons of hype. We're talking "Aquaman" hype. Will it live up to the hype? We won't know until Sunday evening when the weekend box office projections are made public.
What we do know is that Robert Downey Jr. is the star of this film and today is Thursday. Combine the two and we've got a countdown of our favorite Robert Downey Jr.'s characters ("Iron Man" not included) in a little segment we like to call Top 5 Thursday.
5) Leo Wiggins in "Johnny Be Goode": Long ago, we used to contend that this was No. 1 on the list. Further insight into our thought process revealed that this was based solely on under-ratedness of this movie as an '80s classic. We now see the error of our ways.
4) Julian Wells in "Less Than Zero": Downey Jr. plays a drug addict in L.A. in the 1980s. Not much else to say about that aside from "brilliant casting."
3) Charlie Chaplin in "Chaplin": Downey Jr. was so good in his potrayal of the early comic genius that he nabbed an Academy Award nomination for best actor. Add this to your Netflix list if you don't recall the film.
2) Wayne Gale in "Natural Born Killers": A great (and crazy) movie in general, Downey shows his true acting range in this role as a TV newsman tracking Woody Harrelson and Juliette Lewis on a murder spree.
1) Derek Lutz in "Back to School": Anyone who heckles a diver earns a No. 1 spot on any list!
I've been struggling with this list for the past two weeks, ever since I found out the April 18 release date of Al Pacino's new movie, "88 Minutes."
We all know Pacino is among the best actors of the past two generations, perhaps even three. And the old Pacino-DeNiro debate usually ends in whichever actor's movie you've seen last. So, if you watched "Goodfellas" this week and "Scarface" two weeks ago, you're more likely to say DeNiro is better, and vice versa.
But here in Top 5 Thursday, we don't have that luxury. Here in Top 5 Thursday, we have to rank Pacino's five best characters. Yes, that's impossible. So, for one week only, we're going to Top 8 Thursday, partially because Pacino is that good, and partially to play off the "88 Minutes" movie title.
Before I countdown what I believe to be Pacino's eight best characters, please understand that we're talking about just that: Pacino's characters, not the movie overall. And also understand that with a resume such as his, some characters may jump out at you but are not listed here. In that case, ask yourself this question: Which character would you replace with your choice? Feel free to post your comments.
Usually, I throw a little comment after each item the lists, but if you don't know these characters, then you should stop reading now.
And now for the top 8 Al Pacino characters:
8) Lefty Ruggiero in "Donnie Brasco"
7) Lowell Bergman in "The Insider"
6) Ricky Roma in "Glengarry Glen Ross"
5) Tony Montana in "Scarface"
4) Lt. Col. Frank Slade in "Scent of a Woman"
3) Frank Serpico in "Serpico"
2) Sonny in "Dog Day Afternoon"
1) Michael Corleone in "The Godfather Part II"
- La Monica
And now for some video clips of Pacino on Inside the Actor's Studio.
Networks finally ran out of celebrities to cast on reality shows, so they're turning to their kids for help.
MTV debuts "Rock the Cradle" on Thursday night at 10 p.m., which features nine offspring of famous musicians competing for a record deal.
Sounds tragic in a lot of ways. But, at least we can say MTV is producing a show about music.
For some of you, these next two sentences may be hard to believe: There was a time when MTV aired original shows as a way to break up videos and promote different genres of music. Music Television, a network once aptly named, created programs about music and pop culture and would air them. No, seriously, it's true.
Top 5 Thursday remembers all too well those days when the television was about music and not about, well, television. So here we go with our Top 5 countdown of the best old-school shows from MTV:
5) Headbanger's Ball
Metal heads partied deep into the night when this show came along. If not for host Riki Rachtman, there's a lot of music none of us would ever have been introduced to and spent money on back then.
4) 120 Minutes
When alternative music hit the scene, MTV went nuts. It soon became mainstream to be alternative. And even if you weren't too into this music, you watched this show on Sunday nights.
3) Beavis & Butthead
Arguably the most controversial show in MTV history. It started out as an excuse to play bad videos and then blew up into a full-fledged pop culture phenomenon. Love 'em or hate 'em, you watched this show and yelled "Kick me in the jimmy!" on more than one occasion. It's OK, you don't have to lie. We know you did. Heck, I did it on Monday.
2) Remote Control
An MTV classic and its first game show that paved the way for all those silly shows we watched (and loved) during the network's Spring Break coverage. Adam Sandler and Denis Leary got their starts here, as did Colin Quinn and the lovely Kari Wuhrer. Buzz-bin.com will tell you more about this show just in case you don't remember it. Buzz-bin.com will also show you video clips of "Beat the Bishop" and other elements of the show just in case you remember it and want to watch.
1) Yo! MTV Raps
Fab 5 Freddy. Ed Lover. Dr. Dre. 'Nuff said . . . but we'll say more anyway. The Ed Lover Dance. Rappers showing their normal side instead of acting hard. A feeling of hanging out in your basement with Ed, Dre and whatever big-name or up-and-coming rap artists came on the show that week. Fab 5 Freddy interviewing people on location and always being positive no matter what the interview subject said. (I still don't think he ever listened to what they said, but it was compelling TV.) By the way, MTV is honoring the 20-year anniverary of the show's start this April. Check the schedule and watch old clips at yo.mtv.com (and let me know if you beat a score of 8,000 on the Yo! quiz).
P.S. Other shows we liked but not in our top 5: The Cut, House of Style, Beauty and the Beach, Singled Out, Fade to Black.
Demi Moore made the rounds on the talk shows this week to promote her new movie "Flawless" and to remind us all that she's still quite fly.
It also calls to mind how awesome her voice is. Seriously, think about this: If she were calling you every derisive name imaginable, with her sexy voice, would you really care if she meant it? I think not.
Using that theory, Top 5 Thursday salutes the sexiest famous female voices. We're dealing strictly with voices here, not anything else, so in some instances you may have to divorce yourself of any preconceived notions about the person or persons included.
It's strictly a list of female voices we want to hear talk to us about whatever they want. There may be some other nice voices out there to listen to, but these five will drive you mad -- in the best way possible. They could praise George W. Bush or read from an advanced microeconomics textbook and we'd listen to every word.
5) Mariah Carey: Mimi has one of the most powerful singing voices ever, but we'd rather hear her talk and that is absolutely not a pot shot at the No. 1 selling female artist of all-time.
4) Angie Martinez: If you ever listened to Hot 97 in the afternoon for more than a day, you know exactly what I'm talking about. And remember a bunch of years ago when she took a leave from the airwaves to have a child, how happy were you when she returned? I flipped the switch to Power 105 a while ago, but if I'm in the car between 3-7 p.m., I'm clicking to FM 2 on car radio presets for a little Angie Martinez.
3) Angie Harmon: Was there a sadder day than when you found out she was leaving "Law & Order" and your weekly dose of that intoxicating Texas voice would be moved to the random rerun on TNT?
"All of the reports stating the timeframe of his prognosis and his physical side effects are absolutely untrue. We are considerably more optimistic," rep Annett Wolf said in a statement.
Swayze's career took off when he put Baby in a corner and starred in "Dirty Dancing." It took off again in "Ghost" with Demi Moore. These are two of the biggest chick flicks of all time, and help make Swayze one of the biggest chick flick actors of all time.
However, if go beyond those two movies and study his filmography, Swayze starred in some fairly solid guy flicks.
In light of the recent news about Patrick Swayze, Top 5 Thursday counts down his best guy flicks:
5) "Youngblood"
An '80s movie about hockey and becoming a man. Swayze plays the Mustangs' best player who gets jacked in the head on a cheap shot from an archrival. Rob Lowe saves the day.
4) "Red Dawn"
Was there a more manly thing to do during the Cold War days than saving America from those evil Communists? So when those Soviet and Cuban troops invade the U.S. of A., who better than Swayze to stop them?
3) "The Outsiders"
An all-time coming-of-age classic for teenagers and wannabe rebels. Swayze played "Darry," the oldest of three Curtis brothers and de facto father of the group. Peep the rest of the cast: Matt Dillon, Ralph Macchio, C. Thomas Howell, Rob Lowe, Tom Cruise, Emilio Estevez, Diane Lane, Leif Garrett, Sofia Coppola. Insane!
2) "Road House"
Let's see. This movie is about bars, beating people up and being the man. Yep, just about everything you need for a guy flick. Oh yeah, add in some love scenes with then-hot Kelly Lynch.
1) "Point Break"
Via con dios, Bodi! Swayze plays a carefree surfer/renegade bank robber. He escapes the cops -- not suprising seeing how those cops were Keanu Reeves and Gary Busey -- but eventually meets his fate when Special Agent Johnny Utah lets him go for one ride on his surfboard during the 50-year storm in Australia.
"Semi-Pro" hits theaters this Friday. It stars Will Ferrell, which pretty much means we've seen this movie already. Lemme guess: He plays an over-the-top character and does outrageous and ridiculous things for a laugh.
This time, however, he does it as 1970s ABA player instead of a 1970s news anchor or a modern-day race car driver.
Like I said, we've seen this movie before. We'll hate it at first, then after 5-6 more viewings, we won't delete it from the DVR.
Top 5 Thursday counts down the only thing that deciphers one Will Ferrell movie from another: his sidekicks.
5) Bernard 'Beanie' Campbell (Vince Vaughn) in "Old School"
It stops right there and continues right here because what I think Beanie's friend Mitch is trying to say is that true love is blind. As strong as Frank the Tank was, where would Will Ferrell be if Vaughn didn't finish the wedding toast? This was Vaughn's finest work since "Swingers." Vince Vaughn is so good when he plays Vince Vaughn.
4) Cal Naughton (John C. Reilly) in "Talladega Nights"
Shake 'n bake. Mike Honcho. Because I like to party. Thank the cinematic heavens for brilliant character actor John C. Reilly.
3) Pearl in "The Landlord"
Ferrell's 2-year-old daughter played his landlord in this skit that helped make Funnyordie.com a household name (in those households that appreciate comedy and viral videos watched more than 50 million times).
2) Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen) in "Talladega Nights"
Perhaps the best character in terms of well-thought-out and subtle comedy. The French race car driver in a Perrier-sponsored car is pure brilliance. Sipping a macchiato in the car -- hilarious. The game of "Uncle" using crepes. Genius. Cohen/Borat/Ali G nailed the role.
1) Brian Fantana (Paul Rudd) in "Anchorman"
Maybe it was the mustache. Maybe it was the Sex Panther. Maybe it was "James Westphal and Dr. Kenneth Noisewater." Maybe it was "Panda Watch!" Whatever it was, there's no denying the sidekick star power of Brian Fantana.
Many an actor will feel embarassed Saturday morning and many of us regular folks will laugh as the Razzie winners are announced. For those not hip to what the Razzies are, they salute the worst in the movies for the past year.
"Norbit" by Eddie Murphy, a favorite son of Long Island, earned eight Razzie nominations, including a record five individual selections for Murphy.
Ouch!
Murphy's been in the movie for than 25 years and he's gone more of the family route of late -- see the Shrek and Dr. Doolittle franchises. It's easy to forget just how brilliant Murphy was as a comedian and comedic actor.
So, Pet Rock begins its new feature - Top 5 Thursday - will a list of Eddie's top roles:
5) Gumby on "Saturday Night Live"
Murphy was 19 years old when he landed a spot on "SNL" in 1980. He gave us Buckwheat sings the hits, James Brown in a hot tub and Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood, but nothing can top Murphy in a green nerf suit playing an angry Gumby.
4) Prince Akeem in "Coming to America"
"Yes! In the face!"
3) Reggie Hammond in "48 Hours"
"There's a new sheriff in town, and his name is Reggie Hammond."
2) Axel Foley in "Beverly Hills Cop I and II"
Banana. Tailpipe. 'Nuff said.
1) Billy Ray Valentine in "Trading Places"
Eddie's second feature film and his finest work. Any time someone corners the market on Frozen Concentrate Orange Juice, that's worth a mention.
5) Guru
4) Tupac
3) KRS-One
2) Chuck D
1) Rakim
I've been struggling with this list for the past two weeks, ever since I found out the April 18 release date of Al Pacino's new movie, "
5) Mariah Carey: Mimi has one of the most powerful singing voices ever, but we'd 
4) Angie Martinez: If you ever listened to Hot 97 in the afternoon for more than a day, you know exactly what I'm talking about. And remember a bunch of years ago when she took a leave from the airwaves to have a child, how happy were you when she returned? I flipped the switch to Power 105 a while ago, but if I'm in the car between 3-7 p.m., I'm clicking to FM 2 on car radio presets for a little 
3) Angie Harmon: Was there a sadder day than when you found out she was leaving "Law & Order" and your weekly dose of that 
2) Lindsay Lohan: How does a Long Island gal avoid the Long Island accent and develop 
1) Demi Moore: The queen of 
National Enquirer 
"
Many an actor will feel embarassed Saturday morning and many of us regular folks will laugh as the Razzie winners are announced. For those not hip to what the